At the Cabin

Discussion in 'Story Feedback' started by johnhoftb, Sep 20, 2014.

  1. henrytemp

    henrytemp Really Experienced CHYOA Backer

    Sorry if this is the wrong place to ask. been looking at other stories you all have contributed on. how do I find the code for a name the person selects at the start of a story?
     
  2. Duskford

    Duskford CHYOA Guru

    I'm not really sure what you're asking for, but I think you're referring to the codes provided in the 'story guidelines' section, the author creates them when starting a story.
     
  3. henrytemp

    henrytemp Really Experienced CHYOA Backer

    wow, I was way out of it when I posted that. I meant the stories where the reader can choose the character names at the beginning. On a hunch I clicked "add a thread" and discovered the codes were all listed. sorry for the confusion
     
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  4. henrytemp

    henrytemp Really Experienced CHYOA Backer

    I'm still a rookie at this. At The Cabin and Silver lake are the only places I've posted. But some other stories I've discovered that you all have posted on have made me interested- After the party for one
     
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  5. Duskford

    Duskford CHYOA Guru

    The Afterparty is a great one, the characters on At the Cabin were a lot inspired by the ones on there.
     
  6. henrytemp

    henrytemp Really Experienced CHYOA Backer

    The other one is School Vacation, although it hasn't been updated since the spring. I think the attraction for me, in those stories is what drew me into At The Cabin initially- the asshole character who can mess everything up. I've made no secret that Kurt is my favorite character to write for. I think there's a predictability in the "choose your princess"/"Create a bot"/"Seduce an actress" type threads. No doubt a talented writer can make them work, but to me, the chance of chaos, the chance of everything going wrong, makes the chyoa type story more interesting.
     
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  7. johnhoftb

    johnhoftb Experienced

    I have a thing for romances between childhood friends, redheads, and big breasts. When I found a story with a character who embodied all three, a fire was lit and I went nuts. Mind, I haven't written in a while, but I still tend to keep up.
     
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  8. Cretan_Bull14

    Cretan_Bull14 Really Experienced

    I used to write for a couple of good ones back on the old site, Comforting the Roommate being the best. It is about a pair of best friends (a male and a female with names you can choose) who live together in college. In the opening thread, the female lead gets dumped by her boyfriend and our hero does his best to make her feel better. Sadly, this story has gotten almost no love on the new site. Looking back on it now, the female lead is a redhead, so if one wants, the names Chloe and Zack can be used ;)
     
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  9. Duskford

    Duskford CHYOA Guru

    I started the story because of some very specific angles I wanted to work: a guy pining for his beautiful crush (Zack/Victoria); a not-so-popular guy getting it on with the school queen (Zack/Heather); the guy who got to bang his older sister's hot friend (Zack/Hannah); and finally, a weird fetish of mine, teenage guys who got to fuck a woman in her late twenties/early thirties, that is, older but not enough to be considered a mature or a MILF (Zack/Jennifer).

    Looking at you guys' preferences, I'm glad the story could cater to different kinds of tastes.
     
  10. henrytemp

    henrytemp Really Experienced CHYOA Backer

    And these are all great stories, and ones that interested me as well, not to mention the friends become lovers (Zack/Chloe- Gavin Chloe) I would aslo add on to the not-so-popular guy/school queen the Gavin/Heather story that's hinted on in the beginning (his crush) and that's a story I'm exploring in my main storyline that I hope to get back to soon. Another story I want to see at some point is Zack and his teacher. Not sure if/how it fits but it is something I've considered for my "everything goes bad" story.

    There's a reason this is one of the most developed stories on the site. I mentioned Kurt in my post but I want to clarify. This could have been a great story w/o him. But for me, the unpredictability and the wrench he may throw into the main character's plans gives the story another level.
     
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  11. Duskford

    Duskford CHYOA Guru

    I have a plot planned for Zack and his teacher, Mary Moreau, for the story that's gonna be the sequel for "At The Cabin"; well, not so much a long story, but a series of small stories detailing events that will happen before the final pairings get together. I'm curious now, henrytemp, what's your idea for the teacher in a "everything goes bad" scenario?

    I agree on Kurt, I created him 'cause I thought it'd be cool if the main character had a rival for the girls' affections, to give the story a bit of spice. I guess Brandon and Gavin could have been used that way depending on how the thread is written, but I figured a character placed there specifically for that would be better. Although, I'm imagining scenarios with Brandon as an arrogant jock or another one where Gavin uses his brain to throw all sorts of wrenches into Zack's plans to get the girls; it could be fun.
     
  12. henrytemp

    henrytemp Really Experienced CHYOA Backer

    I'd mentioned mirroring some of the scenes you wrote, for example the Brandon and Vicki kiss scene. But my take would have Ashley find out and seek some kind of revenge on her ex and best friend. In that same line of thinking been thinking about when Zack and Heather go to town and the two teachers are introduced. I don't know if it makes sense since I'm not there yet but here's my brainstorming- Since Zack and Heather are not in sync like they are in your main story, they split up once in town. Zack encounters the female teacher and something happens. I haven't fully developed it. On the other hand I've really been thinking about a scene between Heather and the jerk male teacher. My idea- Heather goes to the movie alone. The male teacher goes to the same movie (since his gf is helping Zack) and observes Heather masturbating and uses it to blackmail her into more. I know your question was about my thoughts for Zack-Moreau but being honest about where my thought process was on that whole story.

    I should add, love the Brandon goes bad idea. That was something I toyed with in my brainstorming but hadn't worked out. It makes sense. He's a good guy hurt by his girl. That would cause the best of us to make bad decisions.
     
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  13. Duskford

    Duskford CHYOA Guru

    Interesting idea that one of having the male teacher blackmailing Heather at the movies. I've had a similar idea, though I never wrote it down, I guess you can also consider an 'everything goes bad' idea as well; if you remember the scene where Zack fingers Heather at the movies, I stopped a thread asking if someone else notices them, well, on the idea I had, a random man would notice and approach them, and before any of them knew it, a bunch of men would gather there, shove Zack aside and gangbang Heather before his eyes.

    As for Brandon, I've also toyed with the idea of making him a villain on my main thread, but it won't last long, as a matter of fact, he's already coming to his senses.
     
  14. henrytemp

    henrytemp Really Experienced CHYOA Backer

    This was another idea I thought about but minus the Zack part. Was thinking about a group of football players being in the movie and the gang bang following. Only reason I didn't explore it more is that gang bangs aren't really something I get into reading about and thus not something I'm as interested in writing about. But still a great idea that would work with someone other than me writing it haha
     
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  15. Duskford

    Duskford CHYOA Guru

    That could work better, a group of football players from school, frustrated that the cheerleader captain doesn't give them attention, decide to approach them and take advantage of the situation. I'd include Zack watching the whole thing, though, maybe using the scene as one of those "You've reached a bad ending" threads. I want to write it, but right now I don't have much time to devote to alternate threads, so it'll have to wait for a while.
     
  16. Cretan_Bull14

    Cretan_Bull14 Really Experienced

    Maybe the team could catch the pair going at it and use hurting Zack as leverage against Heather. Zack would of course be willing to take a beating, but Heather would be unwilling to see Zack get hurt because of her.
     
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  17. Duskford

    Duskford CHYOA Guru

    Good idea, it'd make the whole thing more believable, I think.
     
  18. Zingiber

    Zingiber Really Really Experienced

    Y'know, being a cheerleader doesn't exactly make Heather a push-over re physical threat -- rather the opposite.

    It would be easier to imagine them trying to run Zack down with Heather verbally (e.g. maybe they "know" who was in that closet), using old promises against her, or if they took pictures they threatened to spread around unless she gives them some attention.
     
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  19. Duskford

    Duskford CHYOA Guru

    More great ideas! That's the way to go, with everyone's suggestions, we can build quite the scene, I think. If someone wants to take a crack at writing it, please don't let me stop you, as I'll probably won't be able to for a while due to my main thread.
     
  20. henrytemp

    henrytemp Really Experienced CHYOA Backer

    another dumb question. Is there anywhere that explains all the codes writers can use? I discovered on accident that puting * made something italic