Story Discussion and Planning for: An Evil Witch in the Modern World

Just a thread to communicate with the other authors, and to suggest or discuss new ideas. The comments section is a very poor place to have this kind of talk.

WARNING: The content is rough, and it is where it belongs in the NonCon section.
https://chyoa.com/story/an-evil-witch-in-the-modern-world/cover

 

I would add a Cast of Characthers thread page off of the main page to help readers and future writers. Maybe give a short detial of each characther.

 

I will do this. Thank you for the suggestion.

 

One suggestion: Put a link to this thread in the story. It can be in the story description, in the first thread, in the newly-added "LIST OF CHARACTERS, DETAILS, AND DISCUSSION", or even in all three. If there already is such a link you should make it a bit more obvious, as I couldn't spot it.

Also, could we get a bit more info about "heiress Victoria Fiona Mayberry": Her name was mentioned in the opening Maria Baconi thread but nothing more. She can be pretty important and useful character in several story lines: Maria's (obviously), Benacia's own, Vanessa's if she joins Benacia, and Richard's if he goes to help Maria. Because of that I am pretty interested in her.

 

I just wanted to say to all the other writers working on the story, if you see something I write, and it doesn't exactly seem to fit, have at it and put in some edits if you'd like to. I do this for the fun of it, and I love collaborating with others. Part of that collaboration is taking into account what others think. In the end it can only make you a better person, and a better writer. I appreciate any input and any feedback. Thanks, and I truly do enjoy working with all of you. There are some great stories here, and this story is definitely one of them. My hat's off to MissHolvard who came up with a great idea when she introduced this story to Chyoo. Right now I'm kind of suffering from writer's block. You see, I'm what used to be called a manic depressive. I have spurts of creativity that never seem to end, and then next thing you know the bottom falls out. They call the condition bipolar now, which makes me feel more like a bear than anything else. But depression is what it is. I think we all go through it at some point in our lives. We just don't realize it, and neither do some of the people around us. Take care all, and thanks for your time.

 

Thank you for chiming in. I will take a stab at editing some of your entries for format and content, and get them submitted.
Thank you for your contributions to the story!

 

Thank you for your patience and your kindness. I look forward to see what you come up with! I know it will be good!

 

I don't know how this sounds to you, but I have an idea about the thread where I have Susan getting pregnant to fulfill a pact made between Benacia and a demon. I was thinking instead of Benacia attaining more power from the demon, the demon would actually force her to become the baby that Susan gives birth to, making Susan kind of a stand in for Benacia until she is reborn, and comes of age to attain power once again. The thought behind this is that she can't fulfill the pact herself because Elizabeth's body is incapable of producing offspring. For the pact to be able to take effect, she has to be able to produce offspring herself. It could be an interesting plot twist that could inevitably bring in more new characters and extend the story line for quite a while. Let me know what you think.

 

This is something I commented on in the comments to the threads I haven't submitted yet, but there are no demons in the story and I prefer to keep it that way. The way I've written the story so far is that Benacia is as far as she has ever been called, a "witch", and that she suspects there are others out there like here but she has never met them. Meanwhile, there are several organizations out there that know of witches, and know of a certain type of crystal that mutes or muffles the witches powers. They've enslaved and imprisoned witches in the past by placing collars around their necks encrusted with the gems, but with the sealing of their powers they lose their ability to resist aging, so all of the captive witches have since died. Their essence escapes back out in to the world where it will again posess a woman on the verge of a traumatic death, or sometimes become trapped in an inanimate object until the time it presents itself for the witch's soul to escape.

That's it for the supernatural elements, and I think the story and world design work best with that restriction in place. Telekinesis, resistance to aging, and lust corruption of others are it, and being a witch quickly corrupts a woman's view of morality. I really like your work so far Kestrels, but I really do want to keep the supernatural scope of the story limited to keep it narrower and more coherent.

 

Okay, I think I have one of the threads corrected enough that it will work. Please let me know.

 

Which one is it?

For the one that ends with her passing out, you should continue the story in that same thread, as where she wakes up and in what condition isn't really a "choice" for the character to make.

 

I am going to continue some of the threads in the story, as well as introducing a new POV character (one of Benacia's goons sent to investigate Vanessa). Are there any threads in particular that people want to see me kickstart?

 

There are a few threads/story lines I wanted to see continued:
* "Maria Baconi, as she investigates the media conglomerate" - you already added "Pose as a reporter looking for a job."
* "Give the video to the media" - you added "Bring the video to Sunshine Media Corp in person". I hope you'll add some more to it, as I want to get a better idea about both Sunshine Corp and its owner Victoria
* Two of the paths where Vanessa joins Benacia:
** "I want to be like you" currently ends with "Order Anna to be raped by Benacia's men."
** "I want to be your assistant" has only a single bad end as a continuation so I'm curious to see what you'll do with this one

And maybe some more additions to Benacia's own path, as she runs for Mayor, "step one in ruling the world."

 

I have developed a bit more on Vanessa's trip to Sunshine Media Corp and its fledgling femdom power structure. My intent is for Daniel to send Vanessa to investigate a certain "club" that Victoria has been visiting (a sex club associated with Benacia's slavery ring, but Victoria doesn't know the truth yet).

Meanwhile, if Victoria is pursued, Vanessa may be hired as an assistant and a path of femdom, albeit not a corrupted one (the men are treated like dirt around the office, with little recourse).

 

I added several new threads for the Victoria plot, and one more to start Benacia's run for mayor.

 

I started a few more threads. Samantha posing as a boy has a good start now.

 

I just added a couple of threads. Go warn Elizabeth was originally longer, but I decided that Vanessa talking to Elizabeth in person is not the only option and split it in two (the other part is not yet finished).

About the five girls from Keep the video but don’t do anything just yet:
I wasn’t sure where to put the encounter with the five: somewhere on campus or someplace else. If you can think of a better location go ahead and edit that part.

Some ideas about the five girls (most of them are still unnamed):

Spoiler

The first blonde has shoulder-length straight hair and green eyes
The second blonde has curly hair that reaches to the middle of her back and bluish-green eyes
Both are only slightly shorter than Vanessa. They are both proud of their large busts. They like giving tit fucks to men. While they both have some limited experience with women (mostly with each other) they prefer male partners because “tit fucking a strap-on is just not as much fun as tit fucking a guy”.

Depending on who and how corrupts them they can become total sluts that will fuck any number of guys, any time, any place, or they can become slutty bitches that like to tease guys using their breasts but not letting them cum (at least not without a lot of begging from the guys)


Catherine has curly brown hair that reaches to her shoulders and matching brown eyes. She is the same height as Vanessa. Has two major fetishes:
1) Using her feet to tease other people, only to leave them hanging and begging for release
2) Anal sex, with her on the giving end. For that purpose she has a rather large collection of strap-ons
She often combines the two, using her feet to get her lovers to the edge only to deny them release unless they let her assfuck them. She has a collection of photos that show her fucking some of her male lovers. She can use the pictures to blackmail the guys in question but so far has not felt the need to do so

She views most people as beneath her but does a very good job hiding it because she knows it will likely cause her trouble if she openly treats people like dirt. She is the easiest to corrupt and the one most likely to betray the group if offered the chance. Fully corrupted she will become a sadistic dominatrix that loves raping people (men and women alike).

If given the chance (such as Vanessa agreeing to go to her place) she will try to trick Vanessa and fuck her ass with a strap-on


The redhead has short hair and brown eyes (darker brown than Catherine’s). She is a bit of a tomboy. She has rather small breasts but an ass that many guys lust after, much to her annoyance. Among the five she has the least sexual experience (but still more than Vanessa). She is likely to be the most difficult to corrupt


Lisa (called Liz): The leader of the group. She has long straight black hair. Currently it reaches to her shoulders after a relatively recent haircut (it used to reach to the middle of her back, as can be seen on some photos at her place). She is bi and the most experienced in the group as far as sex is concerned but has been single for a few months. She will be a lot more willing to help investigate the suspected witch if Vanessa agrees to become her lover
She is smart enough to realize they are getting involved in something dangerous and will try to be careful as much as possible. She will be difficult to corrupt unless Vanessa screws things up really badly

I have a few more threads planned but not yet written.

 

I really like both of those threads. Nice work.

 

I liked the idea of corrupted and enslaved Vanessa Holvard acting as Benacia's representative during the stories of the 3 Council women, so I am running with that. She manages the school's "Historical Recreation Club", and in a plot I will upload soon, may easily figure out "Sam's" secret.

 

I am updating the story again, this time with a story from Rhoda Holvard's perspective. She is the mother of Vanessa, and I intend on her plot having a strong pregnancy thene.