It all starts at a tavern Fantasy interest check

In the land of Gran, in the Kingdom of Silras, in a small village of Varnak, we enter a bar known as the Shady Tickler. We do not dwell on the name of such a bar, as such an origin story would be lewd and unworthy of our time. Instead, we focus on the inhabitants of this shady bar out in the middle of nowhere.

No no, not the halfling fucking the elven prostitute in the corner. No, the dragonborn putting the bard into the mating press is to far. No, we focus on a dwarf sitting in the middle of this debauched display of lewdness. For out of all the patrons here, he is by far the most serious minded. Indeed, he turns his nose up at the buxom drow, or even the lewd gnome. For he is a dwarf who has come here for a purpose! To hire a rag tag group of individuals to go out on a quest. For you see, this dwarf know something that the others didn't. That a great evil was on the rise, and only a plucky band of adventurers would surely be able to handle it.

Why he didn't just report this to the king of the land, and let an army deal with this is... unknown really. In truth, we rarely question why a small group of people can accomplish what an army cannot. But if that were the case, adventurers would likely not be needed at all. Fortunately, this was the case, and many plucky individuals have found a very nice career in disposing of big bad evil guys.

Dressed in fine blues, and leather breeches, this dwarf is clearly loaded with excess gold that needs to be issued out. And as you approach, he tells you his story. "To the far east, pass the Rapey Woods, through the Long Dicked Orc mountains, and through the dens of the cave toads... was my kingdom."

Why such suggestive names were used, well... someone wasn't very inventive, and decided that lying about the name of such a place was likely a very poor idea. "Unvark has taken over the lands of Drell, and daily he marshals his forces to ready himself for an invasion! My house is fallen, and i'll use what I have left... so please, help me..."

Despite the very tragic tale, it should be noted that this is a silly, debauched tale. Full of sex, violence, and comic relief that in no way reflects why the dwarf is hiring you. So tell me, adventurers... who are you?
***********************************
A silly game with a silly premise, and running tandem to another silly story I plan to flesh out as the spirit moves me. Lord of the Rings meets porn, but with a bigger budget. Sound fun? Have I got your attention? Good!

Who are you?
You are a band of adventurers going forth to battle the evil Lord Unvark, and his evil council. Why hire adventurers? Why not.

So this is Dnd?
No, this is a homebrew system i'm making an attempt at beta testing
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1eCixGeWglWtzASOvLijIErOLTOGUg4gvlnbApPugoTo/edit

While it does have very DnD elements, it is striving for more character customization over flat class mechanics. Want to be a gnome master swordsman? Awesome. A bugbear mage? Cool. A tentacle eldritch horror with a perchant for knocking up bards? Why not, and the joke is on you, all bards are lewd anyway.

How many Players?
2-5

Elements of the story and lewdness
-Silly, think Monty Python and Hitchhikers guide. In theory, there is a serious story going on, but it always seems to get sidelined by odd happenings that seemingly is just very normal to the story.
-Narrative Drive. Let me repeat, Narrative driven. You make this as lewd as you want it to be, or you can be the chaste character that ultimately drags the lewd character from their conquest to finish the adventure. It is your call
-Alignment. Optional, or hidden to be disclosed later
-Race: Anything you want to be, as long as it fits the stat blocks. If you want to play a god down on their luck, it is entirely possible
-Sexy times-Due to varying degrees of fetish on the sight, adding your list of 'No Way' options to your character sheet is a thing. So if certain aspects offend you, just put it down, and your character becomes immune to these things. Example: A character is knocked out, woken up to getting raped by a band of goblins. No Way: Rape. Character wakes up tied up, as the goblins go through their belongings.
-Gender: Don't care, have at it

Character Deaths?
No, despite monty python having a field day with it. Very lewd things may happen, even a potential bad end if you are inclined, but death isn't a thing.

Anyone interested? Throw a reply

 

I might be interested. I'll need some time to read through the system document, though.

 

I'm in. I'm going to look through the system document and make something.

EDIT: Are guns allowed?

 

Let's see if I understand the point buy correctly: We have 8 in each stat and we get to divide an additional 35 points between our stats. So we could have a character with 13 in each stat (before any bonuses are applied). Is that correct?


Here's a partial character sheet (anything missing will be added later). Is there anything obviously wrong with what is there so far?

Name
Gender: Female
Age
Race: Elf?

Job: Mage Apprentice
Rank 1: Apprentice
Learn one Tier 1 Neutral Magic Power.

Heritage (Choose 3)
Dark Vision
You see perfectly clear even in the darkest of places. You may see at night, as well as pitch black areas such as deep water or deep underground.

Highly Intelligent
You or your species is extremely intellectual. +3 to Intelligence score.

Social Creature
You or your species are especially good at speech and communal in nature. +3 to Charisma.


Powers (10/10 Power Slots)
*Note: Keep track of total number of Power Slots
Dodge
Affinitied Magic Tier 1 (Water element)
Mana Flow
True Lore
Rousing Speech
Barter
Leadership

Neutral Magic Tier 1 (from Job, undecided element, but leaning towards Wood)


Equipment (Starting Gold 300)

History

EXP: 0/10

Elemental Affinity: Water
+2 Charisma, +2 Intelligence

Fighting 14 (8+6)
Strength 8
Dexterity 12 (8+4)
Constitution 12 (8+4)
Intelligence 20 (8+7+2 +3)
Wisdom 15 (8+7)
Charisma 20 (8+7+2 +3)


Also, just to make sure, which element is considered the opposite for the Aberrant Power? Since my character has Water Affinity, is the opposite element only Earth (because Water is weak to Earth)?

 

Correct, your aberrant is what you're weak to.

Yes, guns are allowed.

Yes, if you went jack of all trade, 13 sounds about right. Gives you a slightly higher chance of succeeding on any roll, but still some risk involved in it.

And yes, you can effectively bring the cost of any Power down to 0 if you take all the bells and whistles for it

 

Okay, here's a more complete version of my character. Is this sort of character acceptable? Anything I need to change? Anything I need to keep in mind if I leave my character as she is now?

Name: Valerie
Gender: Female
Sexual Orientation: Lesbian
Age: Early 20s
Race: Elf (or maybe Half-Elf - she's not sure)

Current description:
Straight black hair, reaches a little below her shoulders. Blue eyes, D-cup breasts, average height.
Currently wearing: Dark blue cloth dress and simple shoes. Under the dress she's wearing black stockings, black bra and black panties

Second dress: Dark green cloth dress. Also comes with simple shoes, black stockings, bra and panties.

Third dress: Dark red cloth dress. Also comes with simple shoes, dark red stockings, bra and panties.

Job:
Mage Apprentice
Rank 1: Apprentice
Learn one Tier 1 Neutral Magic Power.

Heritage
Dark Vision
You see perfectly clear even in the darkest of places. You may see at night, as well as pitch black areas such as deep water or deep underground.

Highly Intelligent
You or your species is extremely intellectual. +3 to Intelligence score.

Social Creature
You or your species are especially good at speech and communal in nature. +3 to Charisma.


Powers (10/10 Power Slots)
*Note: Keep track of total number of Power Slots
Dodge
Affinitied Magic Tier 1 (Water element)
Mana Flow
True Lore
Rousing Speech
Barter
Leadership

Neutral Magic Tier 1 (from Job; element Wood)


Equipment: (Starting Gold 300)
Cloth Dress (Durability 20)
Cloth Dress (Durability 20)
Cloth Dress (Durability 20)
Steel Dagger (Standard, 1d8, Durability 20)
Gold 180

History
Valerie doesn't know who her parents are. When she was just a few months old she was abandoned outside an academy of magic in a small distant town. Over the years she decided that she doesn't care who her parents were or why they abandoned her.

Valerie's time at the Academy was quite pleasant. She grew up, she studied magic (and quite enjoyed doing so), she discovered her love for pretty girls and “got to know” a number of the females that were at the academy (both fellow students and teachers)...

But all good things come to an end sooner or later. In Valerie's case the end came in the form of a local noble's son. The spoiled brat saw her, liked her, and decided to add her to his list of conquests. She was not interested and made that clear to him. He did not take her rejection well and used his family's influence to get her kicked out of the academy.

Not wanting to find out what else the brat might have in mind for her Valerie left the town, but not before getting some payback. She seduced the brat's fiancee and took her virginity.

Once her little revenge was done Valerie immediately left town, not waiting to see the spoiled brat's reaction. Ever since then she has been traveling from one place to the next, never stopping anywhere for long.


EXP: 0/10

Elemental Affinity:
Water (+2 Charisma, +2 Intelligence)

Stats:
Health: 30
Stamina: 25

Current Stamina: 23

Fighting 14 (8+6)
Strength 8
Dexterity 12 (8+4)
Constitution 12 (8+4)
Intelligence 20 (8+7+2 +3)
Wisdom 15 (8+7)
Charisma 20 (8+7+2 +3)


Fetishes NOT interested in at this time:
Pregnancy
Rape (Combat Rape and On-Loss Rape, in particular; for other types of rape I am willing to at least consider it on a case-by-case basis)
Scat
Mutilation/Disfigure/Dismemberment/Amputee

At the moment I can't think of any other fetishes to add here.



A couple of questions:
1) If I understand correctly the three dresses Valerie owns should be free since they are cloth armor, while the dagger costs 120 (due to Standard quality), so that leaves me with 180 Gold. Is that correct?
2) The Summoner passive mentions constructs. This is the only place in the entire document where constructs are mentioned. Can we get some clarification about these constructs and about summoning in general?

 

Character looks fine, and it just means you have a vengeful student after you for revenge. So revenge vs revenge, revengeception

1.They are free, although offer no protection, just aesthetic value. So yeah, you have 180 gold currently
2. Constructs are effectively walls, dolls, traps, or anything else that is a static representation of your power. In DnD terms, they are illusions and conjurations that serve a specific purpose. That said, other than that single purpose, they do nothing else. Effectively 'set and forget'. If the mage goes down, the constructs vanish due to lack of concentration.

With Summoner added, they become creatures with minds, wills, and actions of their own. They act independently of your character (while still BOUND to your character), and are effectively sustained by the mage who summoned them. While also set and forget, they change change strategies and react to things, while having magic of their own. If the mage goes down with one of these, the construct can sustain themselves, heal, ect.

The biggest drawback of Summons is that they are never can match the raw power of higher tier magic, and each summon after the first starts to cost extra stamina to actually bring forth one. Still, the usefulness is how the player uses them.

 

I'm thinking of making a dragonborn noble, who uses a mixture of magic, one-handed melee, and guns.
He could even be the one with the bard in a mating press.

 

Sounds like a plan, and lewd. Still, make sure you get yourself checked. You don't know where that bard has been.

 

Thinking of jumping in on this train. Would this character be legal?

Name: Sierra
Sex: Female
Sexual Orientation: HOW DARE YOU!!!? Such things are beneath her!... Or at least they were. (She's straight)
Age: Unknown
Race: Angel

Job
Professional Soldier
Rank 1 Weapon Specialty
One-handed melee. Increase Critical Range by +1, and damage done by the specialty by +3.

Heritage

• Flight
• Ageless
• Hearty

Powers (10/10)
*Note: Keep track of total number of Power Slots

• Dodge (1 Power Slot)
• Block (1 Power Slot)
• Evasion (1 Power Slot)
• Shield Mastery (3 Power Slots)
• Defensive Fighter (4 Power Slots)

Equipment 140 Gold

• One-handed Sword (Standard Quality) 1d8+3. Durability: 20
• Shield. Durability: 40
• Clothing. Durability: 20

History

Sierra is a righteous guardian of the just and defender of the virtuous by nature. Perhaps too much. She left her heavenly sisters and descend to the mortal realm to fight the injustices she could no longer stand by to behold. However, upon reaching the mortal realm she has found much of her power depleted and herself vulnerable to earthly temptations. Nevertheless, she is resolved to fight injustice wherever she sees it.​

EXP: 0/10

Elemental Affinity: Heaven (+2 Intelligence, +2 Charisma)

Stats

Health: 30
Stamina: 25

Fighting: 8 + 12 = 20
Strength: 8 + 8 = 16
Dexterity: 8 + 2 = 10
Constitution: 8 + 8 = 16
Intelligence: 8 + 2 = 10
Wisdom: 8 + 2 = 10
Charisma: 8 + 2 + 3 = 13​

Fetishes NOT interested in at this time:

• Scat/Watersports
• Mutilation/Disfigure/Dismemberment

 

since i'm allowing guns already, Heaven is a viable thing as well. Sides, i'm kind of interested to seeing how it works. Tank angel ftw, and looks legal to me

 

I would have liked to go with more armor for her, but I lack the starting cash monies. And Power Slots. On the plus side, I started looking at some of the MtG angels and became inspired as they wear mostly robes.

 

After a quick peruse. I'll give it a shot making a character.


Name: Tassyth
Sex: Female
Orientation: Bisexual
Age: 35
Race: Elder Dragon

Job : Ranger

Rank 1 Survivalist(forest)

While in these locations, you may find food, water, and shelter without needing to roll stats. The amount gathered is one day for one person, although further use may be used. This effect is counted as a Power, and uses 3 Stamina

Heritage:

• Quadruped
• Flight
• Fang and Claw
• Serial Immortality (Bane: Heart Removal) (Rare Genome)

Powers: (10 Power Slots)

Survivalist(forest) (3 power slots)
Rare Genome (6 Power Slots)
Full Attack (1 Power Slot)


Equipment: (Starting Gold 300)
Nudity makes you stronger on this planet! I don't really see any kind of lists for jewelry which would pretty much be the only large investment of finances for a dragon.
Bag of Holding (Poor Quality) Durability(20)**
A Large Cloak. Durability (20)**

History:

Spoiler

(Plus wings.)

Spoiler

I couldn't find a decent image of a small-ish dragon laying on a bed that i liked that had wings. This was a close second, but I wanted a scaley dragon. Furry dragons are fine, but not my preference.

The Elder Dragons of Gran are some of the most ancient ,wise, and powerful beings imaginable. By appearance, they appear as a normal dragon does. However, they differentiate themselves from normal dragonkind by being nigh unkillable. You can stab and cleave an Elder Dragon many times, but until their heart is removed and in its entirety; they will still come back to life. Fortunately, they are quite rare as only an Elder Dragon copulating with another Elder Dragon can produce one of their kind. Mating with a normal dragon produces normal dragons and mating with non-dragons produce dragonborn members of that race.

Partially due to their rarity and partially due to their immortality. Elder Dragons rarely produce children. They are simply too dispersed and due to their immortality, they often hold grudges between one another. However, Tassyth's parents managed to put their differences aside and Tassyth became the first true Elder Dragon born in a generation.

While Elder Dragons are ancient, wise, and powerful. Tassyth...is none of those things. At the age of 35, she is barely even considered an adult by dragonkind. Her scales are not yet an impenetrable wall of armor and she cannot even breathe fire yet. However, she has all the pride and ego that one would expect from a member of her race.

Shortly after she hatched, her parents split. This isn't rare for Elder Dragons, or even dragons in general. However, she held resentment towards both of them for most of her life. Once she became old enough to travel between the two, she did and they both attempted to teach her about life, the universe, and everything. She ignored most of it.

As she grew older, her parents kept her sheltered from the outside world. That simply made her resent them even more. Once Tassyth discovered that they intended to keep her cooped up for at least a few more centuries. She simply had enough. She stole one of her father's Bags of Holding and fled rather than returning to her mother's.

EXP: 0/10

Elemental Affinity:

Void (+2 Dexterity, +2 Intelligence)


Health: 30
Stamina: 25

Fighting :8+8=16

Strength:8 +12=20

Dexterity:8-3+2(void)= 7

Constitution:8+8=16

Intelligence:8+4+2(void)=14

Wisdom:8+0=8

Charisma:8+6=14


*I was conflicted between Serial Immortality and Ageless. I'm not entirely sure what is defined as a "bane". I obviously know what a bane is, but what I do not know is whether it can be as broad as say 'the opposite element to myself' or specific like 'stabbing Achilles in the heel'. Also whether it's something that just kills me outright normally or only when i'm in a death trance. This ruling would likely be the difference between me choosing Serial Immortality or Ageless.

**When not doing a lot of flying, Tassyth wears a cloak on her back to protect her from rain and other elements and to cover other *ahem* parts when in civilization. During periods of flight or long travel, the cloak is eschewed and placed in a Travel Bag that fits between her wings on her back. I'd be willing to pay some gold for a custom one if necessisary.

 

@all
Due to the taking of Heaven and Void, these are valid options if you wish to change to one or the other.

@Omega
Even without heavy armor, passive Heaven damage reduction means very few of the starter monsters will be able to rank up very high damage, especially coupled with Block and Dodge. They probably won't touch her... unless she wants to be touched >_>

@Merkos
-Void is fine
-The bane effectively can 'kill' you while you're in trance, or if it is used to deal a lethal blow (knocking you to 0). As for what it is, it can be anything from silver, holy relics, to even good ol' mistletoe.
-Depends on what type of jewels you're after. Although I imagine an immortal dragon would be less interested in trading in gold for gems, unless she sees gems as more universally traded, or just has more interest in gems in general.
-A cloak is fine, since it is effectively serving the same purpose as normal clothing, same as a travel bag. If you want something akin to Bag of Holding or the like, i'd say it would probably run you the 300 silver, which would be a poor quality bag with a nigh infinite pocket dimensional space in which to hold people, things, and dragon sex toys
-Question: Is this dragon all the time, or more like a Ryu like dragon where she goes into and out of humanoid form?

 

I'd like to point out that we all seem to have forgotten to include Health and Stamina - probably because these two stats are missing from the sample Character Sheet at the end of the linked document. I have added them to my sheet, right above fighting.

 

Whoops, forgot that. Added on the sheet as well, although so far it looks like all of you will have pretty standard Stamina and Health pools

 

I would have had to have taken Shapeshifter in order to change into and out of a humanoid form so... It'll become a little more clear when i actually do the History. She's essentially a rebellious teendragon whose age would translate into 18-19 years old for a human. She is D&D Medium Sized which should make sexual interactions...er....effective?

No stick throwing into the grand canyon when you decide to bang the Colossal++ Dragon.

I'm not sure how effective she'll be as an actual combatant. Which is why I opted for Serial Immortality. Essentially I was trying to make a strong heritage/race, but rare genome is expensive(As it should be) so i had to go for survivability. So at the end of the day, she's just a block of stats.

 

Stab the Heart, remove it, and put it in a box. The Dutchman needs a Captain.

That's pretty much why a dragon would prefer gems over gold. There's a political aspect of gold coins that could make it problematic to use them. Some countries may not accept the currency of others, or might outright attack someone who has it. There could be impurities in it as well to devalue them. Gems are almost universally accepted everywhere and on top that, they have a better weight to value ratio compared to coins.

I've gone ahead and taken your suggestion on the bag of holding. It'll make things easier in the long run anyway.

If you'd rather something a little more vanila. I can go with something else.


Edit: Also this double post was made in order to mention that I think my character's complete with a history and everything now.

 

Dragon is fine, just NPC reaction to factor in with dragons and angels

 

I suspect our party would certainly appear as a capable group of adventurers.