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A new story only stays on the new story list for so long. If the first impression people get of it is ONE chapter, and it doesn't change the entire time it's on the new story list... doesn't make a good first impression. I'd at least try to have one "Hot" or "Interesting" scene written before...

More than welcome, and NO pressure whatsoever to read... I KNOW how long winded I am. :P (Mostly just added a lot of endings) I grew up in the 80's so, Heavy Metal was a guilty pleasure that you could usually only find in College Bookstores. Personally grew up with Battletech, so... there...

Sounds like a good plan. I'm lucky that I have an audience who will listen to my smut... so I read it aloud and I concur... hearing it makes it SO obvious when you've made a typo or another error. Course, maybe I should start taping it... but these days nobody needs the drive time read...

Heh... first thought when reading the opening was "The Good, The Bad, And the Ugly"... in that it felt like a European product. For some reason, imagining this as a dub actually made me enjoy it a LOT more. Thinking of it as a cool movie from Spain, with a local translator and a low budget...

Well, of course NOW, I'm going to use the opening to reference my own Poly Romance Novel with way too much weirdness... And crazy coincidences. And Coffee. Seriously Rereading, I noted how many freaking Coffee drinking scenes I have. I may do something too much- A Special Hell...

Definitely Fixable, If I may be so bold as to make a suggestion, create a separate "Character Bible/File" on the main page, Copy/Pasta the dump onto it, so it's there if people want the info, which you'd be surprised how many WILL, but only if they like the characters, And do a quick rewrite on...

Ok... I'll give the honest opinion, because I hope that's what you want. I... am a little put off by the exposition dump at the start. Normally I get one of those, and I... tune out. There's a lot to remember, and I don't know If I want to actually know any of this. Which is a pity, because...

Well, been a while, but Like Bomber command is up and running again. Today's Target was "The Lord's Companion", a rather fun and elegant work with some decent build up and tension... but since I take NOTHING seriously...

You put A LOT of work into this. You're really achieving immersion, and I get a real sense that there's a world outside of just the characters, so kudos for that. Very much has the high fantasy feel of great import and epic scope. I think you've really achieved what you're aiming for, and...

Yeah, that's how I ended up having to do it. Copy/pasta the chapters into another program, and... word count. Takes a LONG time, but at least you'll have a copy for your own if you didn't do it before posting. Which made it cool to discover I'd written a 500 page novel. :P

I'd honestly put it under SF, because of the setting. Especially if you were going to include the classic spy story Mad scientist bondage devices. I mean... you were going to do that, right? It's like... tradition. I honestly don't get to worried about the categories. I actually feel bad...

And Don't Worry... Dougas Adams was QUITE sure that nobody would bother the gentleman named "Hotblack Desatio" when he stole his name for the lead singer of Disaster Area. https://hotblackdesiato.co.uk/

Absolutely agreed. People should write the story they want to read. For some that's the MC story with the dude in High School, but with different family. I'd humbly suggest that they do a quick search before writing that one, because it's... you know... been done. Add even a slight twist...

Uhm... do you actually READ what you post before you post it? Try it some time because... uh... word vomit... yeah... uh... yeah, see you around... you are not really FUN to talk to. Or make fun of. Both seem to be wasted efforts.

Tut tut... Straw men are SOOO out of season my dear man. And lay off the broken wing crap combined with platitudes and pedantics. All of which are dull and serve only to prove your mastery of debate. Please continue to Demonstrate your Mastery Of Debate, Oh Master debator.

I wouldn't worry about it. Could be worse, just ask the Folks who wrote "Archer".

If were me... If I'm positing this question in that manner, it means that SOMEONE in the story is asking it. The answer is not necessarily the truth, but in the three perspectives it's still possible to give agency to the protagonist if you're willing to assume that the protagonist is not...

Foul! No Rhetoric! Those are the rules that I just made up! Besides... Do you have An Avatar? No Avatar, No Argument! Those are ALSO the Rules that I just made up. At a certain point, it's all arbitrary. Why do corporations smear their logo all over everything they can? So people will...

Heh. Reminds me that I still want to write a Ghostbusters Crossover Fanfic where GB2016 is directed by anybody OTHER than Paul Feig... And stars you know... women I actually would enjoy seeing onscreen for more than a ten second cameo... And has an actual plot other than girls rule boys...