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Hello all, It's been a while.... probably about three years actually since I've been properly active on the site and here because I've been working on new projects or trying to find ways to monetize my writing. I've gone from making my own app (several iterations), which started out really...

Happy to assist where I can?

Hello all, Thank you for taking the time to read this. I along with an incredibly talented writer have begun writing a new story. The Lines We Cross. It is a story I’ve thought about for a very long time and now thanks to the amazing and beautiful (Saskia Darling) has become a reality...

Hey Gorean, So not had a chance to read it all but there are a couple of things I've picked up. The perspective seems to change from POV to third person on the first chapter and on the third chapter of the head girl branch. That's all I have so far but I like he premise of the story, the...

I love it! Can I use it!

I go with option 3 all the time, that just how it rolls :) I flit around 4 or 5 stories at a time though - might be frustrating for the readers at times but it's the best I get out of myself

Hi Ben, First of all, apologies for the late reply but thank you very much for the detailed response. I wasn't sure how the forth wall breaking would be taken but can understand exactly what you mean. It was initially to add another flavour and to give it a try (Entirely different to...

Story : https://chyoa.com/story/Starlight-Shimmer.19308 Hello all, Whoring it out again for some feedback, what do people think of the pace so far? I'm enjoying telling the story and there is a bit more to come, especially from the political mess that will escalate but what about breaking the...

I agree and understand, as I say those chapters have been deliberately vague about the characters, but I hope I've put enough of a description in the following chapters, their dress sense for one thing trying to paint a picture

Yes those stories shouldn't exist on the site

Pictures or no pictures? Hello all, I didn’t want to spend to long on outlining character traits in the branch, link below; so I’ve deliberately tried to leave it open to interpretation but I’m wondering how it reads and if it does need images? Even just a chapter thrown on to show what they...

I would like to have a look and see if it's something I could perhaps add value to?

:) got it all written out on how they meet and affect one another with the multiple choices thrown in (Three alternative endings so far) that'll completely alter the original storyline - the shaping of how they all meet and cause a butterfly effect on each other is really fun to write up at the...

Thanks Zeebop and yeah I thought the episode approach would allow it to flow better with the jumping to different points. I do plan for it to be multiple choice, I just need to get the character introductions sorted with their brief interactions. Moving forwards (Probably episode 2) the...

Hello all, Well I’m back again and back to writing a new story, because I obviously can’t have enough balls in the air. But if I didn’t at the very least get a start on this – it would never happen and just fester. So I’ve posted it with the intention of keeping it going but I guess I’ll see...

OK I like this idea, in order to make it last longer though I'd be more inclined to have the ability to unfreeze and then refreeze as and when the protagonist decided. Totally on board with the non-concensual but it needs to be a better retaliation or just that the main character wouldn't even...

Could the notable writers not include - during a four week cycle, of writers stories that have attained SOW? That would at the very least change the list on monthly basis and send readers down the list to then check out the individuals other stories / contributions?

Using only [*Inside The Game*] as the main story I've read of yours and might I say enjoyed. You've done an incredible amount of work on this story, and I believe it should make SOW (If it hasn't already?) to quote Zeebop "little more showing and less telling" I couldn't emphasise this more...

Hi Nemo, I absolutely agree - my repetitive words have got on my nerves and to the point of re-writing whole chapters to remove that particular annoying itch. I will and have tried to get better at this. Thank you

Hi Zeebop. 1) I do have a tendancy to write like that and reading that feedback I will go through and fix those / resolve moving forwards as I agree nd on this guidance, it looks sloppy. (Wasn't the intention) 2) it was something I thought I'd try - my idea was to make her a bit of a slut in...