Hello everyone! I'm new here I've been writing NSFW since 2019, but only short captions and faproulettes. Now I launched my first fantasy story here. By mistake, I published it before it was over and I'm rushing as fast as I can to offer you the best experience. https://chyoa.com/story/Run-and-Escape.63635 The story is about "you" as the protagonist, transported to a medieval world full of monsters and evil people who want to "use" you. (NSFW, BDSM, forced, and monsters and humans are involved). Some notes: ❤ English is not my first language, so you may find grammar mistakes, sorry ❤ The story is a mix of short texts and images, don't expect any literary masterpiece, just fun ❤ Thousands of choices unlocking up to 60 good & bad endings ❤ More than 200 images capturing every step of your journey ❤ Descriptive text immersing you in disgrace, humiliation, punishment, perils, & success The feedback will help me to write better stories here, you can point the things that I should continue to include in my next stories, and maybe some things that I should avoid *By the way, I'm learning about this site's tools and my game is full of tags that I never add, do you know how I can delete them?
My advice is: don't rush. Keep working on it but don't pressure yourself to complete it. Put a temporary message in the introduction explaining how you're still working on it.
I like the idea of this a lot - it has a feeling of one of those old fashioned text-adventures, which is cool. Definitely going to keep an eye on it. My main point of feedback so far would be that it doesn't seem to actually say on the first page that the player-character starts out as male. The point of view is set to "both" so it might be best to explain that, or have an option to choose male or female at the beginning somehow. As for the tags, when editing a chapter there should be a list of them just under the "foll0w-up question" that you can add or delete from, just by typing and backspacing. It looks like an accident with trying to type in foll0w-up options. Other than that I am new to writing here too, so all I can say is good luck!
Thanks a lot!!! I will try it now Edit: You are awesome lady-lux, as you said, it was an accident when I tried to type in foll0w-up options. Now the TAGS are correct
It just reads like a table of contents to me and not a story with lots of description and detail. So it makes it hard for me to get turned on or invested in characters. Here's an example. This chapter has sex in it, but the entire act is covered in a few sentences. You could expand this to a thousand words easily. You could better setup the surprise which comes in the next chapter. I see you are getting tons of views and a decent amount of likes, so I could be in the minority here. https://chyoa.com/chapter/Explore-the-cave.1601969 I like the usage of pictures. There is a lot of debate in chyoa as to what is too much in regards to pictures, but whatever you're doing there, I like it.
