It's not a bad start, very ambitious with all the branching paths, but you haven't got much depth yet so it's a little difficult to tell where things are going at the moment. Nothing wrong with a slow start, of course. Your style so far seems fine...although I would like to highlight this chapter: An Incubus You always capitalize incubus (not necessary), and you alternate between "Incubus" (singular) and "Incubi" (plural). So that's something to watch out for. You might also consider breaking the dialogue out of the paragraphs, so it might look something more like this: Incidentally, I have no idea what the incubus means when he says "I know you didn't come along." Because Alexis stayed behind while her friend went to peek around the corner? Just feels like an abbreviated thought right there.
