DarkFriday1408
Experienced
They all sound great but, personally i would like to see the second and/or third options being developed for a thread.
At the Cabin
- Thread starter johnhoftb
- Start date
Duskford
CHYOA Guru
The first option sounds the more interesting and intriguing to me. Your version of Taylor always comes off as a bit more proactive than mine, so it'd be interesting to see what she could instigate, or even participate, with the other three. Brandon in the blonde paradise sounds intriguing too, especially if he'll be a bit more daring in the sense of trying to make things happen. Heather and Kurt alone in a room has potential as well, maybe hating and fighting each other so much that they end up tearing each other's clothes and giving in, lol.
The second option has one intriguing set up as well in the form of Kurt, Heather and Hannah in a room. We can only imagine what would happen if Kurt got too horny and tried something.
Duskford
CHYOA Guru
Wrote my first Zack/Victoria sex scene over the last couple of days. Got to say, from a writer's point of view, it wasn't as fun as writing the Zack/Heather scenes I did; felt the chemistry was lacking or something else, not exactly sure. I want to write at least a Zack/Chloe scene, a Zack/Taylor one and another Zack/Heather before shifting the focus onto the reworked version.
Duskford
CHYOA Guru
Had a different idea as to how Gavin could be integrated into the group on the rework. He could have a sister (a twin or a year older) who is the polar opposite of him, personality-wise, and she's very good friends with some of the girls, Heather or Ashley. Then, when they go to the cabin, she has to bring him along, forcing him to interact with the other characters. If I tone down his shyness a bit, it can be an interesting plot to have, I think.
DarkFriday1408
Experienced
Gavin having a sister sounds great, especailly the fact that she will be/could be his total opposite in terms of personality. I think it would work better if she would be his twin and if she would be friends with Heather, Ashley and Madion; it could set the way for Gavin to end with one of the girls. Also if i may, i would suggest Nikki from the deleted The Cabin at Silver Lake(?), i don't remember the name of the story, but from what you wrote about Nikki she seemed to be more direct and confident than Gavin and she was friends with the girls. Also it would be cool if you could make/keep Nikki (if you introduce her) lesbian. She could try to go after Victoria or Chloe, though i would say Victoria, which seems to be - at least to me - either a closeted lesbian or bisexual, or bicurious. But i like the way she has been developed in other threads.
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Duskford
CHYOA Guru
I was thinking about making her a year older and already on college, the reason she knows the girls being that she was the cheerleader captain the previous year, before graduating and passing the torch to Heather. On the other hand, the Nikki idea feels intriguing too. Maybe a combination of the two ideas.
About Vicky, she's actually the straightest of the girls, along with Chloe, Lisa and Madison. Heather and Ashley are the bi curious ones. Taylor experimented, but considers herself straight. Hannah is the only true bisexual at the start of the story.
If I make Gavin's sister a lesbian, maybe there's potential for a plot where they get interested on the same girl.
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DarkFriday1408
Experienced
Now that would be something interesting. Gavin and his sister interested in the same girl and maybe having a threesome with her, that would really blow his mind
)
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Arminius
Guest
Gavin and his sister ending up having a threesome with Heather or Taylor and Gavin ending up with the girl in the end. That should be interesting, because if Gavin's sister gave Heather the torch for cheerleading, than that means that she was in the squad with Taylor and Hannah.
Duskford
CHYOA Guru
Taylor never was a cheerleader, and Hannah was captain three years before the story. So, Hannah never was in the squad at the same time as Gavin's sister, much less with Heather.
The ending threeway idea sounds interesting, if you add the possibility of Gavin's lesbian sister wanting to try cock for the first time or being surprised by it as the bodies roll around each other, lol.
The ending threeway idea sounds interesting, if you add the possibility of Gavin's lesbian sister wanting to try cock for the first time or being surprised by it as the bodies roll around each other, lol.
Duskford
CHYOA Guru
Had to stay at a place with no internet connection for a few days, but now I'm back. It was useful because I had time to figure out some stuff. Got the next chapter of the quest game ready, decided which one-shot scenes I'm gonna write as my parting from the current version of the characters and came up with a few interesting plots for the rework.
As for the one shots, I decided to fuse them all in one scene (four scenes, in a manner of speaking). I'm going to use boomer97's universe, at the part where they are playing the kinky game. As a dare, each of the four guys are going to wait in each of the four bedrooms, and the eight girls are going to have a draw to decide two girls to go into each room, creating four separate threesomes. The funny part is that they don't know which guy is inside each room, and the guy inside has no idea on which girls are going to show up in his room.
About the rework, I thought about using Zack, Brandon and Gavin as main characters in three separate stories that run at the same time and are tied together due to the relationships between the characters. Here are some of my ideas for that; as always, it's still subject to changes:
* Zack Bishop: a reserve player on the basketball team, dates Gavin's sister (or Lisa) at the beginning of the story, but the relationship isn't going so well. Feels lost when the relationship ends, but a few encounters, coupled with some soul-searching, will make him realize that, just maybe, love can be found in the most unexpected place. Or maybe he just wants to enjoy being single? Maybe even realize his previous relationship is what he really wants to get back?
* Gavin Westher: a geeky guy who somehow finds himself inside his popular sister's little universe, much to her chagrin. Can an impossible love with an unattainable girl be what he needs to reach his full potential?
* Brandon Cole: a jokester and one of the stars of the school's basketball team. Was dating Victoria a bit less than a year ago, but cheated on her with her best friend Ashley, which caused all of them to split apart. He's a little more mature now, but can things go back the way they were? Does he even want them to be? (Note: considered making Vicky and Ashley sisters on this, but it'd probably make things too convoluted.)
As for the one shots, I decided to fuse them all in one scene (four scenes, in a manner of speaking). I'm going to use boomer97's universe, at the part where they are playing the kinky game. As a dare, each of the four guys are going to wait in each of the four bedrooms, and the eight girls are going to have a draw to decide two girls to go into each room, creating four separate threesomes. The funny part is that they don't know which guy is inside each room, and the guy inside has no idea on which girls are going to show up in his room.
About the rework, I thought about using Zack, Brandon and Gavin as main characters in three separate stories that run at the same time and are tied together due to the relationships between the characters. Here are some of my ideas for that; as always, it's still subject to changes:
* Zack Bishop: a reserve player on the basketball team, dates Gavin's sister (or Lisa) at the beginning of the story, but the relationship isn't going so well. Feels lost when the relationship ends, but a few encounters, coupled with some soul-searching, will make him realize that, just maybe, love can be found in the most unexpected place. Or maybe he just wants to enjoy being single? Maybe even realize his previous relationship is what he really wants to get back?
* Gavin Westher: a geeky guy who somehow finds himself inside his popular sister's little universe, much to her chagrin. Can an impossible love with an unattainable girl be what he needs to reach his full potential?
* Brandon Cole: a jokester and one of the stars of the school's basketball team. Was dating Victoria a bit less than a year ago, but cheated on her with her best friend Ashley, which caused all of them to split apart. He's a little more mature now, but can things go back the way they were? Does he even want them to be? (Note: considered making Vicky and Ashley sisters on this, but it'd probably make things too convoluted.)
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Arminius
Guest
Interesting developments in the latest threads posted by Boomer97, which i like. Personally i hope that Gavin will end up with Taylor, i understand that there is a age and maturity difference between the two of them, but i think that it would be possible for them to be a couple. But, i understand that the author may have a different view from my own and now it seems that Madison has also become interested in Gavin. I think that Zack will join Heather and Hannah for the threesome, which to be honest, it would be nice and fitting for him, considering what has happened to him so far. I did not expect that scene from Chloe, but it was nice to see that she was confident and went after what she wanted and Carlos got his dream. But, i agree with darkfriday1408's comment in the thread, that what Chloe said and did makes her somewhat of a hypocrite and she might just get more angry at Kurt if he has sex with Susan. I am curious to see what will Kurt do from now on and if the relationship between Chloe and Kurt could be salvaged, and i am also curious to see Chloe's reaction to Kurt's change in behaviour and if Kurt will tell her that he saw her have sex with Carlos and tht he has had sex with Susan (which i think he will). I would also like to know, if possible with who will Chloe end up.Maybe she will manage to salvage the "relationship" with Kurt, maybe she will end up in a relationship with Zack or maybe she will also go after Gavin (he seems popular with the ladies in Boomer97's threads 
) Or maybe she won't end up with anyone.
) Or maybe she won't end up with anyone.
Duskford
CHYOA Guru
Interesting developments in the latest threads posted by Boomer97, which i like. Personally i hope that Gavin will end up with Taylor, i understand that there is a age and maturity difference between the two of them, but i think that it would be possible for them to be a couple. But, i understand that the author may have a different view from my own and now it seems that Madison has also become interested in Gavin. I think that Zack will join Heather and Hannah for the threesome, which to be honest, it would be nice and fitting for him, considering what has happened to him so far. I did not expect that scene from Chloe, but it was nice to see that she was confident and went after what she wanted and Carlos got his dream. But, i agree with darkfriday1408's comment in the thread, that what Chloe said and did makes her somewhat of a hypocrite and she might just get more angry at Kurt if he has sex with Susan. I am curious to see what will Kurt do from now on and if the relationship between Chloe and Kurt could be salvaged, and i am also curious to see Chloe's reaction to Kurt's change in behaviour and if Kurt will tell her that he saw her have sex with Carlos and tht he has had sex with Susan (which i think he will). I would also like to know, if possible with who will Chloe end up.Maybe she will manage to salvage the "relationship" with Kurt, maybe she will end up in a relationship with Zack or maybe she will also go after Gavin (he seems popular with the ladies in Boomer97's threads
The great thing about boomer97's threads is that you don't know what to expect, and that's awesome from a reader's point of view. What you have to keep in mind is that just because character A had sex with character B first, it doesn't mean that A will never fuck C or end up with D, it's a really wild ride.
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Arminius
Guest
I agree with that, it's one of the reasons Boomer97's threads are great. I'm just saying that it would be great to see a story where Gavin ends up Heather or Taylor. In pretty much everything i read so far, Heather is either not interested in a boyfriend or she ends up with Zack. And Taylor is projected as an unobtainable girl, the only time where Gavin sort of gets with Taylor is when they play the game of spin the bottle and he ends up in a kissing session with her. Persoanlly, i think that a good start for a Heather/Gavin relationship would be if Gavin would have a intership at the company owned by Heather's father and he's been there for 1 or 2 years and he gets to know her before Zack and Chloe, and maybe they are sort of friends, like they have some similar tastes in music, movies (SF and fantasy, only on a more nerd level), video games (something on the lines of World of Warcraft or EVE Online). Maybe due to Gavin working with Heather's father, he's been to her house and knows her a bit better and more personally (a bit beyond the image that she projects) and she sees that even though he is shy, he is not exactly bad or a dork. Maybe Gavin decides to ask another girl out and Heather gets (a bit) jealous. With Taylor i admit that it would be more difficult and there he could get with her because he knows Zack or because he does an interships with one of the Bishops, if one of them is in research. Zack's exploits have been seen in threads writen by you duskford and Cretan_Bull14 and other authors. The same could be said about Brandon, Ashley and Victoria. I am talking about them ending with the characters that has a crush on them or with someone else. Gavin and Chloe, seem to be, at least to me, not necessarily the least developed, but they don't really end up with the people that they have a crush on or the people that they want. I know that Gavin and Chloe end up together in one of your threads duskford, but Chloe doesn't really have a crush at the beginning of the story and generally ends up with Kurt and to some degree Zack or Gavin, and Gavin never ends up with Heather or Taylor.
If i could, i would write the story myself, but unfortunately i don't know how to write.
Duskford
CHYOA Guru
Every pairing can work if written well. So far, I found that the ones I liked to write the most were Zack/Lisa and Zack/Heather, and I still want to do Zack/Chloe some time. Those ideas for a Gavin storyline are good, if someone wants to tackle it, it's a good foundation already.
Zingiber
Really Really Experienced
Z<3C!
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Arminius
Guest
What does Z<3C! mean? Just curious.
Duskford
CHYOA Guru
Z for Zack, C for Chloe, and I believe the <3 is a heart.
Duskford
CHYOA Guru
Another possible plot for the rework popped up kinda out of nowhere over the past few days when I met a friend with whom I used to write non-erotic fanfiction several years ago. We hadn't seen each other for about three years, and then I showed her 'At the Cabin' the next day and she gave me what I thought to be an intriguing suggestion. "Why don't you make it a more serious story, with a real conflict going on?"
We brainstormed for a while and came to a possible conclusion. What if the characters go to the cabin as they would in the normal version, but then, on the very first night, something happened that wiped out a good portion of the world population, screwed up the electricity, etc? Then, they would have to learn to live in a harsh post apocaliptic world, meeting survivors (friendly and hostile) as they struggle to survive themselves. What we couldn't decide on was the reason for everything; a strange mist, alien attack, science experiment gone wrong, etc. The sex part would develop in a quite different way though, since the characters would be changed by what happened and be forced to live together in critical conditions.
Thoughts?
We brainstormed for a while and came to a possible conclusion. What if the characters go to the cabin as they would in the normal version, but then, on the very first night, something happened that wiped out a good portion of the world population, screwed up the electricity, etc? Then, they would have to learn to live in a harsh post apocaliptic world, meeting survivors (friendly and hostile) as they struggle to survive themselves. What we couldn't decide on was the reason for everything; a strange mist, alien attack, science experiment gone wrong, etc. The sex part would develop in a quite different way though, since the characters would be changed by what happened and be forced to live together in critical conditions.
Thoughts?
Zingiber
Really Really Experienced
Or: natural disaster: earthquake, fire, storm -- the cabin is cut off temporarily, but perhaps there's some local threat in the meantime they have to deal with that they can't avoid by holing up in the cabin. Maybe they have to escape together. That could be plenty serious in both the struggling-with-other-people and the dealing-with-trouble-together ways.
Prison break/fugitives/hostages is probably overused. I don't see our cabin crew as a good cast for a horror/crime/terror/revenge plot, but maybe that would float some people's boats.
Something that takes the cabin (and perhaps part of the lake/park area) into a strange other place could make it simpler since you wouldn't have to justify what was happening with the rest of the world.
I was sort of thinking that a dimension twister accident that throws Heather's family cabin onto a strange alien planet (maybe with some part of the surrounding area) could give a wild twist to things. The plot of the "1632" series (little town in West Virginia gets swapped with a piece of rural Germany from 1632 during the Thirty Years' War) is like this, but "thrown into the past" instead. Maybe Heather's dad has some equipment down in the basement that was some sort of prototype. Or use the plot for "Buck Rogers", where the modern-day characters are catapulted into a future subjugated society ruled from glittering coastal cities while the underground-dwelling rebels cherish hopes of revolt.
Duskford
CHYOA Guru
Those are nice ideas! I think I had an idea some time ago of the gang stumbling into a time machine and end up going to the medieval era or finding a portal to a fantasy-medieval world. Robert having a device for that in the basement could be a sound explanation.
The idea my friend and I had, though, would be more focused on the survival aspect. Initially cut from the rest of the world, the gang would have to learn to live in harsh conditions, how to get food, build stuff to make their lives better, etc. Then start travelling to see how other places are and maybe find out the cause of the problem. It'd probably be slow for an erotic story, but an idea that intrigued me, nonetheless.
Perhaps not make it too big and do as you suggested, just something that forces them to flee the cabin. Maybe go to the mountains deep in the park and learn all those survival skills there. We have a lot of possibilities then, an earthquake that isolated the park, some strange event that made them leave and now they have to find the cause, etc.