A Party Gone Wrong

The chapter title thing is a product of how I write it. Clara doesn't really know what's gonna happen until she takes an action. But yeah, I'll think about that.

And yeah some of the scenes in the older man's house I was particularly inspired for. Part of why the other branches aren't as well explored since the scenarios are way less complex
 
It really fits the CYOA theme to have to choose your action without knowing the consequence, so it makes sense while moving through the story. As I noted, it's really only an issue if you're looking at the story map and there are numerous chapters like "She plays along" or "She screams." Either way has its merits.
 
Dissonant Soundtrack said:
It really fits the CYOA theme to have to choose your action without knowing the consequence, so it makes sense while moving through the story. As I noted, it's really only an issue if you're looking at the story map and there are numerous chapters like "She plays along" or "She screams." Either way has its merits.
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Some day I might make an index chapter to help navigate all that
 
Thanks for the index, I found the branch where Sarah turns on her that way (https://chyoa.com/chapter/She-begs-her-friend-to-help-her.907982) and that is another particularly hot chapter.

I think it would also be hot if, a few chapters earlier, she gets a text from Sarah to come upstairs and join them rather than Steve coming down to get her.You could leave it ambiguous whether Sarah actually baited her into the trap or Steve swiped her phone and did it, both have potential.
 
Dissonant Soundtrack said:
I think it would also be hot if, a few chapters earlier, she gets a text from Sarah to come upstairs and join them rather than Steve coming down to get her.You could leave it ambiguous whether Sarah actually baited her into the trap or Steve swiped her phone and did it, both have potential.
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I did consider that but it presents timeline issues since she'd get that text in the other timelines too and I'm now realising that her phone would be in her bag which she doesn't have on her so she could check it... Yeah, I might do a rewrite soonish
 
DeviantChalice said:
I did consider that but it presents timeline issues since she'd get that text in the other timelines too and I'm now realising that her phone would be in her bag which she doesn't have on her so she could check it... Yeah, I might do a rewrite soonish
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That's a good point about the phone. It was just a passing thought, because I do like the friend betrayal aspect quite a bit. If you wanted to introduce the phone, maybe its a shit model that is on like 2% battery and dies early on. That way it can play a role in early chapters but be absent to cut her off later.
 
Dissonant Soundtrack said:
That's a good point about the phone. It was just a passing thought, because I do like the friend betrayal aspect quite a bit. If you wanted to introduce the phone, maybe its a shit model that is on like 2% battery and dies early on. That way it can play a role in early chapters but be absent to cut her off later.
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Nah Clara doesn't have pockets and she puts her bag aside immediately and it never comes up again except in the man with car scenario so it's workable.

Those chapters were some of my earliest so yeah they're owed rewrites. Thanks for the feedback
 
Wanted to clear the 15 chapter mark so wrote some sequel to the chapter where she passes out after being raped by Tom.

Honestly some of the most brutal shit I've written in a while.
 
I try to give lots of options but I end up only writing whichever decision people give the most attention to.
 
Iam_DickMan said:
I try to give lots of options but I end up only writing whichever decision people give the most attention to.
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I'm at the point of "write what inspires me, when it inspires me", and mostly I'm not writing options but following paths until they reach a vaguely satisfying pause
 
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