Evil Mastermind! Or comedic adventures of a villain trying to take over the world!

1d5 = 4

No change in my vote.

 

A4
roll = 5

 

A1
And I rolled a 4.

 

Three posts three different answers: is anyone willing to change or compromise?

 

I wouldn't mind A2, but thinking back, I would like a combination of A2 and A4 if that's possible. I do like working in chastity.

 

After thinking about it, I too would not mind a combination of A2 and A4 (since they are not mutually exclusive).

 

Welp that's our answer then, A2 & A4... I'm going to try having this done by this time tomorrow!

 

Now knowing the Reason 'Pussy Smartass' has been slacking off, the question is what does she do about it?

A: Sussy's punishment will be...
A1: A whipping.
A2: wearing a chastity belt until further notice.
A3: Waterboarding.
A4: having to work as a Janitor for at least a month.
A5: being stripped naked and tickled with feathers for 12 hours.

Meanwhile

(Roll 1d5: aggregate result: 4.3333, rounds to 4...)

Time to continue:

When Jade found out Sussy had lied to her she was hurt and angry.
"I thought we could tell each other anything Sussy!" She snapped at her friend later that day, and Sussy hung her head in shame, the cold steel chastity belt already chafing.

The next morning the girls who had been out gathering cash came back.

"Sexy Hotpants: Report!" The Genius Professora Diabolique said, and her new favorite minion sighed.

"We only gathered sixty-four dollars this time, " Dixie Hortons admitted, downcast.

"Sixty-four? Sixty-four?! That doesn't even pay your wages for the past five days! What on earth happened?!?!" The Professora screamed at them.

---

(Four-and-a-half days ago...)

"Hey, Dixie, come into the back with me, we need to talk..." Rob, (the manager of the maid cafe,) had said, and Dixie thought she was in trouble, but didn't realize how much...

"Dix, your performance has been less than exemplary, you and all the others from that temp agency you work for, I'm willing to let that slide, but I need something from you..." Rob said, and put his hand on her thigh...

---

(Back to the present...)

"We all were fired after less than a day for refusing the manager's sexual advances." Dixie admitted.

"God-Damnit!" The Professora cried, throwing up her hands in frustration.

---

A: The professora will seek to punish?
A1: her incompetent team leader. (Increase Morale, Decrease Loyalty.)
A2: Rob the Manager. (Increase Loyalty, Reputation, and Wanted Level)
A3: Both. (Increase Morale, no change to Loyalty, Increase Reputation and Wanted Level.)
A4: Neither. (Decrease Morale, Increase Loyalty.)

At the same time, the professora had to come up with new assignments...

[B1]gathering cash legally! [working temp jobs with a temp agency] Requirement: 5 minions, expected profit: 1d20*1d20 (min 50) dollars, expected mission time: 5 days
[B2]hiring more minions! [putting an adds in local college] Requirement: 2 minions, expected results: 1d4 recruits {Minions*, really, considering they don’t require any training}, expected mission time: 3 days.
*(There is a percentage chance equal to your Reputation of gaining 1 slightly more competent Minion in place of one of the regular minions from this mission: current percentage 5%.†)
[B3] searching for possible experts that would allow you access to higher trained minions [surfing trough hire websites] Requirement: 2 minions, expected results: possible specialist {an interrogation room necessary for this mission}, expected mission time: 3 days
[B4] searching for possible henchwomen [looking over freelance villains, thieves, madwomen, etc.] Requirement: 2 minions, expected results: possible candidates for henchwomen, expected mission time: 3 days
[B5] scouting area for interesting locations [walking around, looking at shops, boutiques, massage salons, etc.] Requirement: 2 minions, expected results: 1d3 intelligence points, expected mission time: 1 day
[B6] Begin working on evil research! [surfing through the internet] Requirement: 1 minion, results:? expected mission time: 2 days
[B7] Mug Manager Rob! [The former maids know exactly when to hit him to steal the daily money pouch from the cafe.] Expected profit: 1000+(1d10*1d10*1d10) dollars. Increase Reputation and Wanted Level by 1d3 and Minion Loyalty by 1d5. 5 minions for 3 days. (Only available if you chose to punish Rob, the manager at the maid cafe: and only available on this vote... If you also chose to punish Dixie, you gain 1d5 Morale instead of Loyalty.)
[B*]write in (you have enough intelligence points to rob the ATM, but not enough for a boutique or other store.)

Ongoing missions
-buying The machine on auction (7 days till auction... The Genius Professora Diabolique must be available on the day of the auction...)
-guarding base (8 minions)
-doing janitorial work around the base (1 minion: 30 days left minimum)

Resources – 10 202$
Intelligence points - 3 points.
Basic Minion – 9 (1 minion(s) on missions, 9 in base)

Named characters:
THE GENIUS PROFESSORA DIABOLIQUE - The College Professor, a dumpy woman of 45 years with glasses as thick as the bottom of a coke bottle.
Named Minions:
Minion Sussy Samatar (AKA Pussy Smartass): a rather attractive busty blond. (currently working as a janitor in the base.)
Minion Jade Lii: Sussy’s best friend, an Asian woman of 21 years with long midnight-black hair. She is very tall for an ethnically Chinese person, standing 5’10”.
Minion Dixie Hortons (AKA Sexy Hotpants): a tall, hot, Caucasian, brunette with a 'bomb' rack...

Base
Minion Barracks (for 20 people)
Mastermind’s room (with desk and evil vibe)
Kitchens (serve whatever is in the freezers)
Storage room (for storing... like things, you know)
The retooling of The Steel Mill in progress [1 day left]

Profits:
0$ a month

Expenses:
-1900$ a month

Balance:
-1900$ a month


[X1] Hit The Thrift Stores For A Small Barracks Upgrade: the EM will go out to local thrift stores and other places where cheap used furniture and the like is available and come back with things like coffee makers, warm blankets, toasters, pajamas, alarm clocks, and other minor improvements for the barracks this has the effect of giving you one 'extra' phantom minion per ten full normal minions you have, representing well-rested and caffeinated minions being able to get a little more done each day. This action must be repeated for each barracks module/expansion, or the bonus is lost until it is. Cost: 1d10×1d10(min10)$ and the EM will be busy for 9 days bargain hunting, only having time to post orders at the base and read reports (not in person...)
(Why does the EM have to do this? Well, basically, you can't trust minions to spot the really EVIL deals or catch the tricky ones where they're passing garbage off as primo stuff...)
[X*] suggestions for Evil Mastermind actions.

†(These minions will have training in one randomly selected basic specialty at rank 2, allowing them to teach other minions if you have an appropriate Training Facility, and one mundane 'special ability' of some sort. [The Interrogation Room will work for most basic specialties, though using it decreases loyalty slowly, is inefficient compared to dedicated facilities, and only allows teaching two other minions at any one time. You would probably be better served to buy dedicated training facilities like the Minion School, MMA GYM, or Evil Labs if you get a Specialist Minion for most minion training activities, as they take less time for more minions and don't decrease Loyalty.] Also be aware that more highly trained minions might demand some kind of perk for continuing to work for you after a while, like increased pay or better quarters. The higher you keep minion Loyalty and Morale the longer this will take, but if you refuse their demands a sharp drop in Loyalty and Morale will occur, which can turn into a vicious cycle...)

 

A2
B5, B6, B7

 

I'm sorry but you don't have enough minions free for all those tasks, you're one short: (Sussy is being a janitor for a month, remember?)

EDIT: OOPS, forgot surfing the web takes only one minion...

 

A3
B2, B6, B7

 

A3 can't have minions slacking off.
B5, B6, B7

 

Okay, A3 and B5, 6, and 7 are our winners, starting work on the update.

 

A: The Professora will seek to punish?
A3: Both Dixie and Rob. (Increase Morale, no change to Loyalty, Increase Reputation and Wanted Level.)

[B5] scouting area for interesting locations [walking around, looking at shops, boutiques, massage salons, etc.] Requirement: 2 minions, expected results: 1d3 intelligence points, expected mission time: 1 day
[B6] Begin working on evil research! [surfing through the internet] Requirement: 1 minion, results:? expected mission time: 2 days
[B7] Mug Manager Rob! [The former maids know exactly when to hit him to steal the daily money pouch from the cafe.] Expected profit: 1000+(1d10*1d10*1d10) dollars. Increase Reputation and Wanted Level by 1d3 and Minion Loyalty by 1d5. 5 minions for 3 days. (Only available if you chose to punish Rob, the manager at the maid cafe: and only available on this vote... If you also chose to punish Dixie, you gain 1d5 Morale instead of Loyalty.)

Day 13: 14:00 Hours. The Professora's Office.

"Report Minions!" The Genius Professora Diabolique, "That's 'THE GENIUS PROFESSORA DIABOLIQUE'!" -said to her minions, "DAMNIT STOP IGNORING ME!" -who had, "I MATTER DAMNIT!"

"Who are you talking to Boss?" one of the Professora's minions asked.

"No one," The Professora Diabolique said, deciding to have this conversation with the narrator at a later time when it didn't make her look like an unmedicated schizophrenic. "Now, I said 'report'." She snapped at her two minions who had been out exploring the area, they looked at each other concerned but did as they were told.

"We did really well this time boss, we went downtown and found an easy target for a quick robbery: the attendant's booth at a parking garage. We'll need to scope it out some more to be sure but we could probably make a few grand with minimal effort, maybe more if we can steal and hawk a few cars."

"Good, what else did you find?" The Professora Asked, quietly seething that she couldn't tell off the narrator for not using her full villain title.

"Well, nothing else worthwhile for a robbery everywhere else has better security, but we did get a complete set of bus maps..." Her other minion said, handing over a stack of folded sheets of papers.

"Hurgh..." The Professora growled, still seething, then barked "You're Dismissed!" and both minions left.

[+3 Intelligence points.]

Day 13: 14:15 Hours. The Professora's Office.

The Professora was still angry but had nothing better to do than sit and fume, however, she knew the Narrator could hear her thoughts so she decided to try to have a little mental chat with him...

[[I know you can hear me, and I can hear YOU, but only sometimes, who are you and what are you?]] She asked mentally.

The narrator, being bored and awake far later than he should be, chose to respond.

<I'm the narrator of your story, sort of like your guardian angel, only not nearly that nice.> He told her.

[[Why won't you use my proper title THE GENIUS PROFESSORA DIABOLIQUE?]] she asked.

<Because I have no need to shout to do my job, and spamming cap's lock is rude.> He replied.

[[Caps lock? Are you like, writing out my life?]] The Professora asked, alarmed.

<Not just me, several other people too, we all collaborate to create and bring to life the world you and your minions inhabit.> The Narrator told her.

[[So, could you, like, have my minions find a suitcase with a million dollars in it?]] She asked, hopeful.

<Can I? Yes. Will I? Probably not, unless something very bizarre happens that would make that make sense.> The Narrator explained.

[[Humph!]] The Genius Professora Diabolique grumped, accompanying it with a rude mental image of what she thought the narrator looked like jumping off a pier.

<Actualy, I live in a desert region, there are no piers within a hundred miles of my house.> The narrator replied smugly.

Almost against her will, The Genius Professora Diabolique smiled. [[I see what you are up too.]] she said, annoyed but also amused.

<Anyway, you shouldn't respond to me except mentally, it will make you look crazy: and for all you know, you are: MUHEHEHEH!> The narrator said, and with that, fell silent.

[[I know I am, but not because I'm hearing voices Narrator, you're real...]] she thought, but hearing nothing further, started to do paperwork...

Day 14: 03:00 Hours. The Steel Mill Floor.

"So, it's done at last!" The Professora said, looking out over the gleaming and automated modern cutlery factory that had replaced most of the old Steel Works that she had secured for her base. All the minions were back for the night and stood in two rows for the ribbon cutting ceremony that The Genius Professora Diabolique had arranged. With a pair of red-handled scissors, she cut the big red ribbon and pulled the leaver that booted up the factory floor. At once the machinery began to hum to life and start churning out:

A: What will the cutlery brand be called?
A1: Wicked Sharps,
A2: Cutting Edge,
A3: Diabolique's Own,
A4: Bladetronics,

Brand cutlery and stainless steel silverware. If they could keep things rolling along they will make a good amount of money from the profits on this plant.

[+2500$ a month.]

Day 14: 17:00 Hours. The Professora's Office.

"Minion Emerald, Report!" The Professora Barked and Jade stood to attention. "What have you discovered from your internet research?"

Day 13: 10:07 Hours, The Base Offices.

"What does the professora expect me to find just surfing the internet? Sussy got in trouble for going on porn sites and that's half of the web..." Jade grumbled. Still, she did her best and found an interesting set of files, someone on the deep web was doing research based on the Professora's theories, and it seemed it might pan out...

Day 14: 17:01 Hours. The Professora's Office.

"I found some research based on your theories on the deep web, it looks like it may have been done by one of your former students..." Jade said and handed the professora the printouts.

"Let me see that!" The Professora snaps, grabbing the sheaf of papers, and skims them quickly... they are attributed to 'FifthHorsman333' the online handle of:

B: whom?
B1: A former student named Jane Lancer, who the Professora once dismissed as a no-account slacker.
B2: A former student named Carl Groner, who the Professora always felt was driven and bright.
B3: A former colleague named Professor Jefry Dalton, who the Professora had a crush on.
B4: A former colleague named Professor William Vanders, who the Professora heard was the man who decided she should be fired.
B5: A rival Evil Mastermind called Fifth Horsman the 333rd, who she knows by reputation but has never met...

Day 15: 02:39 Hours. The Professora's Office.

"Sexy Hotpants: Report!" The Professora said with a smile.

Day 15: 02:09 Hours.

Five dark figures melted out of the shadows as Rob headed for his car with the night deposit bag for "Doki-Loki Maid Cafe".

"Just give us the bag Rob, and you get to walk away tonight..." one of them said in a mechanically disguised voice.

"Hey I don't want any trouble," Rob said putting down the money pouch.

"Good, now get in your car and drive away, just like normal." the same individual said, and Rob did as he was told, then when he was about a mile away, pulled into a gas station and called the cops...

[+1072$ +1 Reputation, +? Wanted Level, +1 Morale.]

Day 15: 02:40 Hours. The Professora's Office.

"The mugging was successful but unfortunately it seems we picked a slow day, the drop-off bag only contained 1072 Dollars." Dixie said.

The Professora was in a good mood at the moment, and so was slightly forgiving. "Things could be worse, but you still have to face your punishment for letting your team goof off for four days on my dime," The Professora Purred.

C: How will the Professora punish Dixie?

C1: Dock her pay.
C2: Waterboarding.
C3: Make her eat The Professora out in front of the others.
C4: Being stripped naked and tickled with feathers for 4 hours.



At the same time, the Professora had to come up with new assignments...

[E1]gathering cash legally! [working temp jobs with a temp agency] Requirement: 5 minions, expected profit: 1d20*1d20 (min 50) dollars, expected mission time: 5 days
[E2]hiring more minions! [putting an adds in local college] Requirement: 2 minions, expected results: 1d4 recruits {Minions*, really, considering they don’t require any training}, expected mission time: 3 days.
*(There is a percentage chance equal to your Reputation of gaining 1 slightly more competent Minion in place of one of the regular minions from this mission: current percentage 6%.†)
[E3] searching for possible experts that would allow you access to higher trained minions [surfing trough hire websites] Requirement: 2 minions, expected results: possible specialist {an interrogation room necessary for this mission}, expected mission time: 3 days
[E4] searching for possible henchwomen [looking over freelance villains, thieves, madwomen, etc.] Requirement: 2 minions, expected results: possible candidates for henchwomen, expected mission time: 3 days
[E5] scouting area for interesting locations [walking around, looking at shops, boutiques, massage salons, etc.] Requirement: 2 minions, expected results: 1d3 intelligence points, expected mission time: 1 day
[E6] Begin working on evil research! [surfing through the internet] Requirement: 1 minion, results:? expected mission time: 2 days
[E*]write in (you have enough intelligence points to rob the ATM, but not enough for a boutique or other store, though you're getting close...)

Ongoing missions
-buying The machine on auction (4 days till auction... The Genius Professora Diabolique must be available on the day of the auction...)
-guarding base (8 minions)
-doing janitorial work around the base (1 minion: 27 days left minimum)

Resources – 11 274$
Intelligence points - 6 points.
Reputation - 6 Points.
Basic Minion – 9 (1 minion(s) on missions, 9 in the base)

Named characters:
THE GENIUS PROFESSORA DIABOLIQUE - The College Professor, a dumpy woman of 45 years with glasses as thick as the bottom of a coke bottle.
Named Minions:
Minion Sussy Samatar (AKA Pussy Smartass): a rather attractive busty blond. (currently working as a janitor in the base.)
Minion Jade Lii: Sussy’s best friend, an Asian woman of 21 years with long midnight-black hair. She is very tall for an ethnically Chinese person, standing 5’10”.
Minion Dixie Hortons (AKA Sexy Hotpants): a tall, hot, Caucasian, brunette with a 'bomb' rack...

Base
Minion Barracks (for 20 people)
Mastermind’s room (with desk and evil vibe)
Kitchens (serve whatever is in the freezers)
Storage room (for storing... like things, you know)
The retooling of The Steel Mill: Complete!

Profits:
2500$ a month

Expenses:
-1900$ a month

Balance:
+600$ a month


[X1] Hit The Thrift Stores For A Small Barracks Upgrade: the EM will go out to local thrift stores and other places where cheap used furniture and the like is available and come back with things like coffee makers, warm blankets, toasters, pajamas, alarm clocks, and other minor improvements for the barracks this has the effect of giving you one 'extra' phantom minion per ten full normal minions you have, representing well-rested and caffeinated minions being able to get a little more done each day. This action must be repeated for each barracks module/expansion, or the bonus is lost until it is. Cost: 1d10×1d10(min10)$ and the EM will be busy for 9 days bargain hunting, only having time to post orders at the base and read reports (not in person...)
(Why does the EM have to do this? Well, basically, you can't trust minions to spot the really EVIL deals or catch the tricky ones where they're passing garbage off as primo stuff...)
[Currently, not enough time to do this mission before the auction for the Professora's prototypes occurs.]
[X*] suggestions for Evil Mastermind actions.

†(These minions will have training in one randomly selected basic specialty at rank 2, allowing them to teach other minions if you have an appropriate Training Facility, and one mundane 'special ability' of some sort. [The Interrogation Room will work for most basic specialties, though using it decreases loyalty slowly, is inefficient compared to dedicated facilities, and only allows teaching two other minions at any one time. You would probably be better served to buy dedicated training facilities like the Minion School, MMA GYM, or Evil Labs if you get a Specialist Minion for most minion training activities, as they take less time for more minions and don't decrease Loyalty.] Also be aware that more highly trained minions might demand some kind of perk for continuing to work for you after a while, like increased pay or better quarters. The higher you keep minion Loyalty and Morale the longer this will take, but if you refuse their demands a sharp drop in Loyalty and Morale will occur, which can turn into a vicious cycle...)

 

A1
B1
C4
E1, E5, E6

Just to make sure, was E7 supposed to be on the list of options? Since we already did that once.

 

Thank you, you're quite right, it wasn't.

 

A3
B1
C3
E2, E4, E5

 

It seems we have another tie, is anyone else willing to vote? Failing that, is anyone willing to compromise?

 

I'm willing to concede conflicting votes in order to progress the story.

 

Ok, I said "compromise" not, "abandon my position completely just to move things along", and I refuse to accept that. Therefore, since no one else is voting, and I'm not accepting that so-called 'compromise' I'M going to act as the tiebreaker, and forge a compromise myself!

Votes at present are:

A1, 1. A3, 1. Result: A1

B1, 2. Result: B1

C3, 1. C4, 1. Result: ... Options not mutually exclusive: "Por qué no ambos?"

E1, 1. E2, 1. E4, 1. E5, 2. E6, 1. Result: E2, E4, E5, E6

Now to write the update.

_________________________________________________________________________