Grammar/Content Police: Stuff that drives you crazy/common mistakes to avoid

Aman Onfy Mous

Aman Onfy Mous

Really Experienced
I try and not make a big deal about things like this, but sometimes it really bugs me to see these kind of errors. Everyone knows that there are the obvious mistakes that people make (there/their) in any writing, which is a shame. But there are also mistakes that authors make that are pretty specific to adult fiction, with some of it incredibly widespread, and it can really break the immersion.

A few of the things that I see a LOT.

"Amble" instead of "ample." Amble is a type of walking. Ample is a description of size. This can be an auto-correct issue, but I see it so often, and so consistently, that I think in many cases people honestly have just learned this wrong.

"Thongs" of "thong." A pair of panties is one garment. A pair of thongs is two garments. I know it's inconsistent, but that's how it works. Your character should pull on (or rip off!) her thong, not a pair of thongs.

I used to get this wrong a lot, until it was gently explained to me (;)), I think a lot of guys do (maybe I still do? flame me if you think so!). If you increase the LETTER in a bra size (the cup size), you make your character's breasts larger proportional to their overall size. This is how you make a slender character with a big chest. If you increase the NUMBER in the bra size (the band size), you're making your character's entire torso bigger, which increases breast size some, but NOT relative to her overall size, and can end up describing either an obese woman or a bodybuilder if you take it too far. Sizes are tricky, but generally a 34E and 40C are the same size, but for wildly different figures. A woman who goes from 34C to 34E has had her breasts grow. A woman who goes from 34C to 40C has mostly just gained weight (or muscle).
 
Aman Onfy Mous said:
If you increase the LETTER in a bra size (the cup size), you make your character's breasts larger proportional to their overall size. This is how you make a slender character with a big chest.
Click to expand...
Bra sizes only describe the size of bras, not the size of breasts. That's one reason why bra sizes aren't really useful in writing.
So assuming that the given bra is the "perfect fit" for the girl...
Yes.

Aman Onfy Mous said:
If you increase the NUMBER in the bra size (the band size), you're making your character's entire torso bigger,
Click to expand...
Yes.

Aman Onfy Mous said:
which increases breast size some, but NOT relative to her overall size,
Click to expand...
Technically, the volume of the breasts is slightly higher but they would look smaller on the bigger frame.

Aman Onfy Mous said:
generally a 34E and 40C are the same size, but for wildly different figures.
Click to expand...
Not quite.
The volume of a filled 34E bra is smaller but might look way bigger than a 40C.
But that's only assuming the given bras are numbered in the same bra size system and produced by the same manufacturer.

To conclude...
I think that qualifies for the initial question and if bra sizes are used in a story for describing breasts, it's very likely I'll walk away.
For more reasons why not to use it, see Writing about breast size.
 
Yeahhh, I pay special attention not to describe boobs by bra size. If nothing else, it's not just that useful? Even if you do what most people do, and use "A" and "D" only as a synonym for "small" and "big", respectively, it's a missed opportunity to present your reader with some solid smut. How do they look? How does the outfit affect them? How do they feel? Are they perky? Saggy? Big nips? Small ones? How do they make your protagonist feel?

Two other pet peeves I have:

Pretty much everything surrounding female virginity. Bleeding doesn't mean she was a virgin. Not bleeding doesn't mean she was not a virgin. There might be a hymen. There might not be. My impression is that US education on the subject is particularly bad.

Also, the idea that if you're really fucking a woman, you can inflict some kind of permanent change on her pussy. This ranges from the hentai notion of 'shaping' it to be a perfect fit for a man's dick, so that she won't be properly satisfied by anyone other than him, to the more Western notion of stretching a woman out with your magnum dong until men with smaller dicks (ie, everyone, you massive stud you!) won't feel anything anymore. Fun fact: vaginas are mostly muscle, and can stretch and then contract again. Tearing is possible, of course, and if that's the story you're writing, more power to you, but to the vast majority of people, that's not at all sexy.
 
gene.sis said:
Bra sizes only describe the size of bras, not the size of breasts. That's one reason why bra sizes aren't really useful in writing.
So assuming that the given bra is the "perfect fit" for the girl...
Yes.


Yes.


Technically, the volume of the breasts is slightly higher but they would look smaller on the bigger frame.


Not quite.
The volume of a filled 34E bra is smaller but might look way bigger than a 40C.
But that's only assuming the given bras are numbered in the same bra size system and produced by the same manufacturer.

To conclude...
I think that qualifies for the initial question and if bra sizes are used in a story for describing breasts, it's very likely I'll walk away.
For more reasons why not to use it, see Writing about breast size.
Click to expand...

Without even getting into the discussion of sizing, because sizes (and thus sister sizes) are wildly inconsistent across different items (and in how the wearer feels), which is its OWN problem...

Though separate and distinct from my original point--which is to get the sizes right if you DO use them--I generally agree and try to avoid using bra sizes to describe breasts...but sometimes (rarely) they slip in when I feel like I've run out of descriptive terms.
 
I also consider nonsensically-inserted bra sizes a red flag. You cannot simply observe a pair of breasts covered by layers of clothing and determine the precise band and cup size of their perfect bra; most women struggle to work it out for themselves. The lack of standardisation and correlation with the actual size and shape of breasts means that bra sizes should not be used to convey information about their appearance to the reader.

It is possible to give bra sizes in a sensible way. For example, it could (but is not guaranteed to) be an acceptable descriptor by a narrator who has a good reason to actually know the size - perhaps the protagonist is the bra-wearer in question, their partner, or their close friend. It could make for good storytelling to explain how they know. There might be a scene where our curious hero looks at the tag on his housemate's bra after she left it in the washing machine, or maybe his lab partner is constantly complaining about all of her problems including her struggle with finding a well-fitting bra. Maybe you hang a lampshade on the whole issue by having your female protagonist make a remark about it while she's getting dressed in the morning: "Apparently I'm a 30E, even though I swear my boobs are barely bigger than average. Bra sizes are so confusing."

On a more general note, these mistakes make my stomach churn:

"Alot" is only correct when describing a certain kind of fictional furry beast.

"Queue" or the sadistic "que" in place of "cue"

Ending questions with a full stop just because they're rhetorical: "Isn't it strange how he's been acting lately."

Ending statements with a question mark just because they express puzzlement: "I don't know why you would think that?" (I'll let "I wonder" statements slide...)

Randomly capitalising objects: "I put on my Robe and don my Wizard Hat."
 
Aman Onfy Mous said:
I used to get this wrong a lot, until it was gently explained to me (;)), I think a lot of guys do (maybe I still do? flame me if you think so!). If you increase the LETTER in a bra size (the cup size), you make your character's breasts larger proportional to their overall size. This is how you make a slender character with a big chest. If you increase the NUMBER in the bra size (the band size), you're making your character's entire torso bigger, which increases breast size some, but NOT relative to her overall size, and can end up describing either an obese woman or a bodybuilder if you take it too far. Sizes are tricky, but generally a 34E and 40C are the same size, but for wildly different figures. A woman who goes from 34C to 34E has had her breasts grow. A woman who goes from 34C to 40C has mostly just gained weight (or muscle).
Click to expand...

gene.sis said:
Bra sizes only describe the size of bras, not the size of breasts. That's one reason why bra sizes aren't really useful in writing.
So assuming that the given bra is the "perfect fit" for the girl...
Yes.


Yes.


Technically, the volume of the breasts is slightly higher but they would look smaller on the bigger frame.


Not quite.
The volume of a filled 34E bra is smaller but might look way bigger than a 40C.
But that's only assuming the given bras are numbered in the same bra size system and produced by the same manufacturer.

To conclude...
I think that qualifies for the initial question and if bra sizes are used in a story for describing breasts, it's very likely I'll walk away.
For more reasons why not to use it, see Writing about breast size.
Click to expand...

Not this shit again...:rolleyes:
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top