At the Cabin

duskford said:
I know what you mean, lol. I wish I had more time to work on the story as well.
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Yeah, I've been working nights at a nursing facility, and it's an understaffed place. Let's just say I'm never bored. The residents are nice though, that's a plus. They say they pair me with the more uncooperative ones, but I never have any issues. It's just... a lot to do, so it's thrown everything out of whack. This upcoming weekend with be the first I feel like I can relax in over a month since I started.
 
I think in choosing roommates there are two possibilities- romance or conflict. of course you can mix them up. I chose to shoot off of Vain's thread because i loved the parings, but i chose said pairing to create conflict. Chloe likes Zack, but Zack has a thing for Vicki. Kurt wants Vicki, but she wants nothing to do with him. Gavin has a crush on Heather but she is out of his league.

Of course things get mixed up quickly. And in my thread Gavin wants Chloe, Zack and Vicki have a date etc. But still, each room pairing has tension and that is what I want in my story.
 
Had a dream that pretty much sealed it for me but falls in line with most people's wishes. Chloe arc would have had a slower build up. I just hope when I get to those threads, I'll be able to them justice. After updating my outline, i realized I'm missing a thread between Redux and Arrivals and Accusations. Typing up Ashley, in the middle now.

Done. May have to edit it, kind stream so??
 
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Zingiber said:
I wish I had more ideas than the few scenes I've added here and there. I feel like this story gets lots of love and attentive readers and editing, so contributing feels well rewarded.

-Z.
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You're welcome to contribute whenever you want, Zingiber. Your threads have always been great and well written.
 
I do credit you for helping me flesh out Hannah and Taylor's friendship and personalities in my mind, Zingiber, so you've definitely had an far-reaching impact to me on the story. As I said ages ago, thanks for letting us play in your sandbox, Duskford :)
 
Z, I think your right about this story getting a lot of from the readers and writers. Nothing wrong with just addind a scene here or there because one of your scenes might inspire someone else. Believe it or not, I've got the better part of a week planned out just because I was bored one night and read someone's story string. When I got to the end of what was written, I saw a scene in my mind where Vic pulls Ash into the shower, starts making out, then confronts Ash about her feelings regarding Zac. That's one of my final pairs btw. Now here I am trying to build up to that point with an outline and notes for about a weeks worth of ideas.
 
That's the most rewarding aspects of the story for me, to see where everyone takes the characters I've put out there. You guys came up with great storylines that I could never have imagined. As umbra said, I highly encourage anyone who wants it to add at least a thread, your scene, no matter how small or out of place, can inspire someone to write an entire branch; if one looks at the Story Map, there are a lot of alternate paths just waiting to be picked up.
 
Still not happy, but there it is. Hope you enjoy.

Sorting things out and Gavin will probably be posted on Friday, also need to recheck Ashley sometime this week.
 
I don't know if you guys saw the latest screens Friedman posted on the CHYOA 2 topic, but that system with conditions and variables seemed really interesting to me. When it launches, I'll probably try to write a branch where the reader controls Zack and goes through different outcomes depending on variables.
 
Thinking about mixing up the party games. Instead of just using Strip, and Truth/dare, might add in Never/ever. I'm not going to use spin, but maybe I'm missing some.

Looked at the updates, they look good.
 
umbra said:
Thinking about mixing up the party games. Instead of just using Strip, and Truth/dare, might add in Never/ever. I'm not going to use spin, but maybe I'm missing some.

Looked at the updates, they look good.
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I just played "Never Have I Ever" as a large-party get acquainted game. Two lines of people; if you'd done it, cross to the other side. Caller stays put, of course, having never done precisely that thing called out. Wikipedia describes it as a drinking game, but I might imagine Taylor and Hannah would pour cold water over that notion if they're around: "Drinking games about sex? Please no. Just no."
 
The way I've played never/ever or 'never have i ever' is
Caller calls
Everyone who had drinks
If only one has, they tell
Of no one has caller, takes penalty.
 
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So, thinking about doing a rewrite of my main thread, this time from zero. I was rereading the entire thing and the word that came to my head when I finished was "Frankenstein". I think my indecision between Heather or Victoria for Zack's main pairing, coupled with the recent emergence of Ashley, really hurt the story I wanted to tell, since whenever I changed my mind, the story changed as well. And it had the effect of dragging Zack's character down with it; he came across as too fickle about his women (I seem to remember Yarkoz alluding to it on the orgy storyline), and that definitely wasn't my intention.

Another reason was that I think I only got to know my characters for real during the course of writing, both the main story and the alternate paths, and by discussing each one of them with you guys here on the forum. For that reason, I think a rewrite would be benefited by it, that is, the characters having their "complete personalities" since the start of the story.
 
That's the joy of writing duskford, actually getting to know your characters as they develop. I don't see my interpretation of Zack to be bad per se, but a nice character flaw for him to overcome. He's nice and considerate when his mind is on the ball, and people recognize that in him, but his eyes wander, which frankly is realistic for someone who's 18. That's why I really liked your "taste of the future" short threads in "Tales of Silver Lake" -- when Zack matures, he's pretty powerful. (And in the married-to-Heather scenario, they would be one of the more influential power couples of the country.) I see that maturation happening after having epitome sex with Hannah and thinking aloud with Ashley -- but then he could easily fall into the trap again with her, especially given the apparent psychic bond that the Bishops and Woodsens have. The story is really an exploration of Zack's mind and a coming-of-age story for everyone involved. Zack's relationship issues, whatever they may be, are a central component of that type of story.
 
Duskford,
Something I've found with my own writing experiences is our own ideas and desires can change within the course of writing. Also, given this medium, our writing is often influenced by the works of others. Having recently read most of the threads on here, I don't see him as fickle, per se, but more not knowing what he wants. A perfectly natural response for a young male growing and learning about themselves.

Also, a warning from someone who has fallen into this trap too many times. Don't try to be perfect, otherwise your stories will never be finished.

Either way you decide, I'll be looking forward to your stories, and also hope you find my interpretation entertaining.
-Umbra
 
In the "having fun" alternate beginning threads, I wrote that Brandon was upset with Madison hanging all over Zack because of his past, particularly with Lisa. That doesn't mean they're not friends, but he is protective (overly so one might say) when his sister is concerned and he is aware of Zack's more flawed qualities, so it translates into a denigration of him. At his very worst, I would categorize Zack as fickle and I decidedly agree that Zack is just confused and unsure about many, many things in his life.
 
Thanks for the feedback, guys. The problem isn't so much Zack being fickle about who he likes, it's the execution I've made that's the main issue, in my opinion. It's ok for him to be unsure, but the moment that he pulls both girls into his mess and kicks 'H' to the curb when he decides he wants 'V', that makes him a jerk (I've wrote that, and that's what bothers me).

He arrives at the cabin liking Victoria and then gets interested on Heather; as the days pass by, he unconsciously pursues both of them and makes them interested on him. In the space of a day, he makes out with Vicky in the kitchen, gets dumped by her thanks to a plan, gets Heather's hopes up by having a good time with her at the movies and the lookout point and then dumps her because of Vicky almost as soon as they get back, has sex with Hannah and decides he doesn't want Vicky anymore, finishing with a sudden interest on Ashley. That's the result of my indecision regarding the story, and that's what hurt both the story and Zack's character in my opinion.

But there are other reasons for a potential rewrite; the mystery of the bears and the hidden man, for example, I feel that I didn't execute this particular storyline as I originally intended; then there's the fact of Chloe and Gavin getting together too early and making them unavailable for other plots; Brandon and Ashley going for other people less than a day after breaking up a two-year relationship; the list goes on. All in all, I feel that the characters's personalities changed a lot with time since I first posted the story, but it isn't realistic in a time span of just six days inside the story.

I want to be able to write the whole story knowing what I know about them now, and go deep into each one of their heads to make their actions plausible. And most of all, start the story with all the pairings already set in stone, so I can develop each one properly, without the need of making the story a Frankenstein again because I changed my mind. It's very likely that I'll change a few details about their backgrounds as well, for example, Zack and Gavin not being too much alike, Zack and Ashley having a previous friendship (it always bothered me a lot that their sisters were best friends and they just befriended each other through Brandon), etc.
 
Now that's a better explanation and I can see why you would want a do-over.

Some of those points are why I decided to start from the start. The history I have created using your work as a starting point addresses some of your issues.

A/Z/C have a brief history that explains C's issues, and to an extent Z's attraction to V. I wasn't planning on using the bears, but you did name the lake silver, so maybe a silver vein.

But just know that whatever you plan, you'll have people supporting your efforts.

-Umbra
 
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