DoAdventures
Really Really Experienced
Hello community,
Looking for some assistance if possible, I'm trying to write a fight scene and have the choreography of the fight exact in my head but really struggling with the delivery.
Examples:
1. Slowly walking behind the man, Lara grabbed at his ankles and brought him down towards her, crushing his face into the floor beneath him before sliding off and onto the floor at her feet. (Description before this may help but essentially the guard is in an elevated position and Lara plants his face into the floor beneath him)
2. Staring down the hallway littered with priceless artefacts and a large chair, a heavily armoured guard stood facing down at the main entrance gallery, his gun tracing the ground beneath him and taking aim at the door. Taking her opportunity without a moments notice and rushing towards the guard. Pelting down the hallway towards the guard, her light feet betraying her and giving away her position, the guard turned in time to see Lara leap and propelled herself from the chair jumping to the left and grabbing the guards head bending him backwards, leaving his head lodged into the banister before dropping safely to the ground. (don’t know if there is too much information here or if there needs to be more)
3 – 5 take place in the same room
3. Taking a deep breath and closing her eyes in bravery, Lara turned in the doorway and dropped to the floor, slid kicking the first guard behind the legs and sending him to the floor with a spray of bullets crashing into the celling. (Think I can live with this but still trying to perfect it)
4. “There she is!” shouted one of the men as he tried to drive the heel of his boot into Lara’s face but lost his screamed out in pain as Lara sunk her knife behind his knee then into his thigh as she climbed up his body to her feet. (Not sure how this reads and doesn’t really have the urgency)
5. Gunshots came thick like winter hail. The tin projectiles cutting through the thick smoggy air, oblivious to their purpose. Each one ripping into something and battering into the guards back Lara used as a shield. (Want to try and write something about her dropping to the floor and using said guards gun against the man shooting – perhaps something like the green night vision of the man’s goggles lit up as the sparks from his comrades gun pointed at him blew)
Looking for some assistance if possible, I'm trying to write a fight scene and have the choreography of the fight exact in my head but really struggling with the delivery.
Examples:
1. Slowly walking behind the man, Lara grabbed at his ankles and brought him down towards her, crushing his face into the floor beneath him before sliding off and onto the floor at her feet. (Description before this may help but essentially the guard is in an elevated position and Lara plants his face into the floor beneath him)
2. Staring down the hallway littered with priceless artefacts and a large chair, a heavily armoured guard stood facing down at the main entrance gallery, his gun tracing the ground beneath him and taking aim at the door. Taking her opportunity without a moments notice and rushing towards the guard. Pelting down the hallway towards the guard, her light feet betraying her and giving away her position, the guard turned in time to see Lara leap and propelled herself from the chair jumping to the left and grabbing the guards head bending him backwards, leaving his head lodged into the banister before dropping safely to the ground. (don’t know if there is too much information here or if there needs to be more)
3 – 5 take place in the same room
3. Taking a deep breath and closing her eyes in bravery, Lara turned in the doorway and dropped to the floor, slid kicking the first guard behind the legs and sending him to the floor with a spray of bullets crashing into the celling. (Think I can live with this but still trying to perfect it)
4. “There she is!” shouted one of the men as he tried to drive the heel of his boot into Lara’s face but lost his screamed out in pain as Lara sunk her knife behind his knee then into his thigh as she climbed up his body to her feet. (Not sure how this reads and doesn’t really have the urgency)
5. Gunshots came thick like winter hail. The tin projectiles cutting through the thick smoggy air, oblivious to their purpose. Each one ripping into something and battering into the guards back Lara used as a shield. (Want to try and write something about her dropping to the floor and using said guards gun against the man shooting – perhaps something like the green night vision of the man’s goggles lit up as the sparks from his comrades gun pointed at him blew)